The Retirement Home TV Is Set To Winter Sports

By Friday23

We old, um… senior sports fans watch a lot of TV here at the retirement home; My mother would have yelled, “You’re watching too much TV! Go read a book instead!”

At the moment, Mom, I think I’m averaging about 16 hours a day TV. That includes the nights when I sleep. On my sleepless nights I can easily hit 20 hours. I watch any time, morning, noon and night… Luckily the earth is round so there’s always something on.

My main channel is the sports. We had a good summer of Tennis and Football, followed by a fall of Snooker and now we are in the depths of winter and winter sports. Nothing could be more boring. One of the old guys here in the retirement home voiced it: “If I have to watch another downhill race or ski jump I’ll start screaming…”

Unless the channels come up with another exciting sport soon I’ll have to turn to the crime channels where I can pick up yet another modus operandi for my unwritten murder novel. Have you watched some of these crime movies? Have you seen the depths that crime writers think normal humans can sink to?

This is just a gentle reminder to the folks back at the TV studios. We are seniors, we have been around a long time; we have seen and forgotten things you haven’t even thought of yet. If you are all out of sports and you want to spare us from watching crime or worse, take another look at the some of the old movies on Turner Classic Movies or MGM. We grew up in World War II – where are all the old war movies? And the comedies, the guys that made us laugh? Danny Kaye, Bob Hope, Walter Matthau? Those were the great movies from our own times and they had us rolling in the aisles all those years ago. We could use some of that laughter now that we are older, a lot wiser but still stuck with the TV you dish up for us.