There is nothing more mean and ugly in this world than to have a loving gift, a beautiful spirit, and a desire to give and share these things when there is no one to share them with.
Growing up in a dysfunction house, I have become a ginormous magnet attracting equally dysfunctional people in my life. I have not realized how toxic these relationships have become until recently. sometimes it seems safer to justify the wrongs and continue holding onto the unhealthy because I have become so acquainted with the abuse of it.
It is easy to overlook the flaws and lists help put things in perspective.
- Makes me feel like if I am not bubbly and talkative that I am boring
- Makes me feel like I am not good enough
- Judgmental
- Is bitter at authority and women (ironically)
- Does not really care for my opinions
- Lies about everything
- Backbiting
- Got jealous when I started pursuing my dreams
- Put me down indirectly about it
- Leaves me in the dust
- Makes me uncomfortable
- Is not pursing good things
- Does not encourage morality
- Passive-aggressive
- Energy sucking to pretend around
- Is emotionally abuse in making others guess what they are thinking
It is impossible to heal your soul when you have such a negative cloud of energy around you all the time. It is lonely and difficult to break out of the pattern of abuse, but there is freedom in the release. I am thankful for a blogging community that understand and are pursing health. I could not do it without each and every one of you <3
Here is an expert from the musical Rigoletto, a movie that really speak to me as a child. The opera is a bit old school, but the words are very powerful.
Has anyone ever experienced this kind of relationship cycle before? Is there anyone in your life that is hindering you from being the best you, you can be?
Stay strong <3 You are not alone