A few days ago I received the following comment on my post about Advocare:
“All of your information is invalid. Sorry you failed at a company and product that’s un-failable. And how could you really find they were hiding ingredients…. really….. You have all that money to “prove” the company it lying. Funny because of the 200+ people I’ve helped with income, weight loss, energy increase, performance, and overall health would beg to differ with your lies. Get real facts, and don’t knock something because you’re a failure at life!”
signed: “Youre a Liar!!” from email: youreastupidb*tch@f***kyou.com (edited, obvs)
I have received a lot of feedback about this post. Mostly good, and some, as you can expect, has been negative. I get it. I’d be upset too to find out that a company that I had invested a lot of time in, and was making money off of, was being questioned. I don’t expect everyone to agree with me, but It is really shocking when someone lashes out in this way. This person had no valid argument. I actually didn’t even understand their “points.” Just plain and simple anger. And having the “name” and “email” that they did only discredits them all the more. I actually ended up approving the comment.
I had to chuckle a bit at that last line “you’re a failure at life!!!” It reminded me of when my sisters and I would bicker as kids. Mom wouldn’t allow us to call each other stupid, so our brilliant subsitution was “you’re a RUDE-EE!” Wow, that cut’s deep don’t it?
It’s the same concept as road rage. Imagine how differently you react when someone cuts you off in the grocery store as opposed to while you are driving. It’s that face-to-face interaction that serves as built-in accountability. When you can see someone’s face, it’s much more difficult to lash out irrationally. We also aren’t generally as bold when the person we are addressing would have the option to interject.
It’s why my husband and I try not to text each other when we are in an argument. Things always get said (generally from me) that would never be said if we were face to face or even talking on the phone.
I have a friend who, if someone honks at him in traffic, will get out of the car, walk up to the honkers window, and kindly ask them if there is an emergency or if they have something they need to say to him.
Every. Single. Time. he said they sit, staring forward, refusing to acknowledge him. (I don’t recommend this, especially for girls like me, but this guy is big, and knows how to protect himself.)
Because it’s so easy to be sassy and ballsy and outspoken behind the shield of a computer screen. Not so easy when you are sitting face to face with the person.
It’s part of the dehumanizing of our society. I’m thankful for technology. It makes my life so much better in so many ways. But it also allows us to stop viewing people as actual people at times. People with mothers and fathers and children and pets. With struggles and insecurities. With love and hurt and extreme joy and deep pain.
It’s pointless, really, to say or do something online that you wouldn’t in real life.
It reeks of cowardice.
That’s why when I got this comment I was more confused and a bit amused than anything else. I welcome all dialogue, but to comment with a fake name and a fake, abusive email is really, just a bully move.
It’s a good gut check, for me especially. To evaluate everything that I write, even if I am writing about something that I think is unhealthy, misleading, etc., to do so respectfully. Because I believe that everyone is created equal, and equally loved by God. So to treat someone with utter disrespect is just a knock at God.
And after all, everyone is someone’s son, daughter, brother, sister, mother, father…
There are exceptions, for times when someone has violated the basic rights of another through violence or abuse, but that’s not what I’m addressing right now…oh Lord, please, lets not start a philosophical debate…
Anyhow, It’s curious to me that people expect for me to get upset if they disagree with me. I don’t claim to know all of the answers or to be right about everything that I write on here. I have a lot of friends and family who think kombucha is gross, and would never dream of drinking raw milk, who love their diet soda, and think cheetos are God’s gift…but we don’t let it cause a fizzure in our relationship.
I’m not afraid to be wrong, and I’m not afraid for you to disagree.
But let’s do it respectfully, shall we?
live well. be well.