Friend: Dear Clark, Once again My twin has hurt my heart. I am struggling with this emotional roller coaster. I am trying to line my self up with my vortex & manifest a new life. I keep thinking that I am good & at peace with where I am. But I am obviously not. This emotional roller coaster is killing me. I am going to try once again to give her space but as I continue working on my own life & getting ready for here to come home. I am worried that I will gain ground & she will come back begging for me again & I will do as I always do & love her unconditionally. How does one deal with these things? HELP ME !!!!!!
Clark:
My friend… nothing is more engulfed in suffering then what it is to be in suffering because we are not united.. This unity is a further way to what you are doing to yourself. Let’s take your twin out of the equation for a moment. In this moment is there clarity of what you are and who you are in being? Do you feel the difference? Do you feel the election to be in suffering for any reason?
This is a very humbling experience when you don’t seek outside yourself to be the love you always are even when you are in a space all to yourself.
When I had come to this humbling moment as a twin united but not in union, I wanted to blame her for not being in my existence in the physical, for me it was that I was not worthy of her being in my existence or I was pure love and she was just doing other things to me such as manipulation or taking me for granted for the things I could give and do for her. My trust in her was completely faded and completely oblivious to who I was. This is the direction I was pointed in. I was seeking blame in our not being together as something I was or wasn’t doing not seeing that as I felt this way I was sending out energy that was not going to give me what I wanted and needed inside my mind. The mind was the tool that was seeking to turn this screw and pound this with a hammer to make things right. The tool known as the mind at this time was still my go to because I wanted to find answers to what brought us together not seeing that it was the same thing that was infecting her and me to keep us apart.
In nature the twin union is very much the same energy that swans go by that show you the truth about what we experience in any form of energy to include the energy that the mind gives you. If you ever see the two swans who mate for life you will see them spend moments where their energy is colliding into each other. Whether in touch or in chaos it never last for long periods of time but they do share the energy of what mating means. They even will stroll alone not to far from each other but they move in beauty as they always are. This is what you experience without seeing it from the mind.
When I figured this out the pull to be together became greater because when we would interact whether it be on the phone, through Instant message, or when she saw me physically she saw something in me that had carried that same very frequency that stated I am love and peace in motion. This can be highly attractive to twins who can find this frequency to share with the other. We were friends at this time and she was married and I was finding my way. It seemed as though all was the way it should be in the human world of being connected. The pull inside myself was of love no matter what. I couldn’t be with her, I didn’t make this a hindrance for either of us, I realized that to be in this state of being, caused me to emit energy that said I was not what she wanted or needed. Yet with the mind turned off, I found a place in peace in being. As a matter of fact, I could not stop smiling because of the way I saw myself in all things, no labeling from the mind was what impacted the most in what I was. It became more and more apparent that what I was experiencing was the truth about how energy is in all things. If I felt bad or felt any negative energy it started to come across as energy infecting everything I came to or was drawn into.
This even happened to me in my career at the time, I started to see how my energy impacted results I started to become more contagious with positive energy that caused a positive work environment and achieved phenomenal results. The truth about energy is that it created us all and it makes up all that we are. If you stay in this way of feeling how will you call to your twin. If you stay in this energy how does it make you feel. If you find yourself upset or in a way that emits chaos as energy then expect that when you let it go that things will change. NO, I am not making this about you.. This is about you and your connection to energy, what you do in that energy emits, an what attracts itself to you. This step is very awakening to what you can finally experience in all things.
If you stop and look around you, how many are smiling? Enjoying what they are in as a being? There are very few moments you may see this. How would you interact knowing you can change that energy by emitting the love you are and the divine inside you? This finally says I am, the I am that is awake because I see the energy as it is. As you dissect what you think, you start to ask the right questions about your thinking and what it has in purpose in what divides you from the love you are, and the love you connect to by the twin calling to you.
When you trust enough within, you will trust enough without. You will not keep the past as a means to point to what doesn’t or does work and you certainly will stop being in a future in the minds picture of who you are in the world of form. This is where you are in this moment. A simple choice, and simple way to view energy. You are the love in the center of that energy, it is how you remove the suffering. Suffering will not seek food where the mind is not present, it needs the mind for this and you have no use for either.
My friend look inside the universe of you it has many places to still explore and expand within as you place love in those places where you can visit realize you are not without this truth!
Love Deeply,
Clark