First things first: I don't like being told what I can and cannot do or what I need to be doing or what I should be doing. Period. I never have and I never will. My parents and close friends can attest to this. Enough said.
Moving on with the post now.
It has come to my attention that I am not the only waiting with a dating dilemma at the present time. I've been informed by several friends that the dating pool is rather "slim" right now. Everywhere, not just in the Valley of the Sun. I have friends, guys and gals, in various states across the country and a few in big cities. "We" have discussed
this dating dilemma. Each of us are in our mid 30's. Not one of us has an answer right now to remedy the situation, do you? I wish we did but, we don't.
A few random statements during various conversations with my friends:
- "...maybe people have lower expectations than before or more perhaps...".
- "I need to move to a more populated area with younger people. There isn't enough people of the opposite sex here in my age bracket."
- "Who is this person? Umm, the profile and conversations does not jive with our "in-person" meetings..."
- "...not sure if I will meet the "criteria" of the opposite sex..."
- "...it's a little bit scary out there...can I handle it?"
- "...what if I have to deal with more dishonesty..."
- "wow, I'm not sure if this guy/gal is right for me?"
- "what if I'm not ready for this?"
- "can I get past the baggage and hang-ups from my prior long-term relationship?"
- "ok, I'm ready to get married and have kids, let's go...I'm ready!!!"
Yes, these are real comments and valid concerns from a few friends. Amazingly enough it's very interesting to know that the guy's are just as concerned as us girls! This made me feel very good to know. Seriously, it did. It's nice to know the guys are just as concerned about finding a partner to spend the rest of their life as we are. And that they too want to have children as well.
Let me point out that a few of us are using online dating website (the same one) and the other few are contemplating joining the online bandwagon in the near future.
Let me come right out and say that online dating is not for me. It simply isn't. At a later time it might be, but I'm a bit wore out from the boy drama. Yep, I really
said typed that. Boy drama. At a later time online dating might re-appear on my radar screen but not anytime in the near future. However, if and when, I do re-enter the online arena of dating I will most certainly be extremely detailed as to my expectations and rules. Yes, rules. Very clear, very concise rules for going on a date with me. Including the very first date - or the "meet and greet" as I like to call it. And then of course rules and regulations for future dates, etc. Guidelines that are to be strictly followed by myself and the "date". Period. No exceptions. This is really important. You (me) should never deviate from your values and ethics. Period. However, each of us knows that
sometimes this happens. If/when this happens you need to be prepared to deal with the outcome and/or situation. Enough said.
You know, it's really funny that I am sharing all of this right now because I told my girlfriend
before I went out on any dates that I wanted to "type" out rules, etc. for the dates and she
laughed and said you shouldn't have to do that "if" it's the right guy. Well, I am thinking
now that maybe I should have typed out my rules, hmmm? Anyhow, you live and learn. I definitely have. And most importantly STAY POSITIVE and smile! I am still quite confident that I will find the one, one day...but, I'm not going to focus on that. I'm going to focus on staying positive, enjoying life and focusing on my career for now. Yep, that's my plan for the remainder of this year and if a fabulous man comes along in the interim I'd be more than happy to entertain going on a date with him. However, I will stick to my gut instinct and follow my rules and regulations. No deviations period.
Have a wonderful evening, until next time.
{image via pinterest}