Shit Movie of the Day – The Hottie and The Nottie

Posted on the 05 November 2012 by Plotdevice39 @PlotDevices

Apparently I don’t hate myself enough because I had to sit through this movie.  By sit, I mean I had to constantly pause and then start again after I took like a 20 minute break.  It took my 3 hours to basically get through this movie and it is only 90 minutes long.  I didn’t even know that this movie existed and frankly I wish that I hadn’t because this is the most vapid, insufferable movie I have ever seen in my life and I watched Jack and Jill.  So fuck Paris Hilton, cause who hasn’t, and fuck this movie.  Lets dive into this cesspool of vapid waste and film.

An attractive bachelorette (Paris Hilton) finds that her chances of landing a man hinge far too much on her unattractive best friend (Christine Lakin), whom she goes out of her way to find a mate for by denying a childhood friend’s romantic advances until he finds this hottie’s pal a mate in this Regent Releasing comedy. ~ Jeremy Wheeler, Rovi

I would have loved to have sit in on the casting process for the women who has to play the Nottie role.  I mean how degrading is that to you as an actress when the casting crew is looking for someone who will be put into makeup, act along side Paris Hilton and basically shit on the entire movie.  I realize that the actress Christine Lakin is in makeup and doesn’t look like that, but I mean all those vitriolic comments has to eventually just eat away at you.  This whole movie is just using ugly people as a running joke, that’s it!  This is a gross out comedy but all the comedy comes at the expense of the ugly girl in the movie.

I just couldn’t watch this in one sitting considering it took my twice as long to get through this movie than it did any other movie so far.  I am not sure what the aim of the story or movie is supposed to do to me as a viewer.  Am I wanting Joel David Moore to come around as his character and realize that the unattainable women isn’t the one he is supposed to be with?  Am I supposed to have some tacit connection with Hilton’s plight as a good looking women who is trying to look out for her bestie or whatever?  Everyone besides the punchline June are horrible human beings.  Everyone of them makes the bile in my stomach rise to the top.

This movie, I mean, Jesus.  This way made with no purpose other than to give Paris Hilton a vehicle to star in, oh and to be the hot one in the movie as well.  That is just insulting.  Christine Lakin is actually really good looking, far better than Hilton and this is just insipid. I couldn’t take any of the jokes for what they were, the people involved were unlikable, and this is just pure trash.  I feel like the hollow, shell of a man after watching this movie.  It was made because of Hilton, it’s message is shallow and trite, and everything about this movie makes me dry heave as to how terrible it truly is.

I realized  I haven’t even discussed the movies plot, premise, acting, or anything in general.  That alone should tell you how I felt.