Sometimes you have to push past the things that scare you most in order to acknowledge your own value - to allow you to expect nothing less from the people you surround yourself with.
This is something that personally, I find incredibly difficult to master, and know I have a tendency to do myself down sometimes without even realising it. I get scared of whether I will live up to people’s expectations, and as a result, I end up holding back and don’t give myself the opportunities that perhaps I deserve. And, what makes matters worse is - I know I’m not the only one. So many close friends of mine do the same thing. One of my closest girlfriends did in fact go as far as to say the other day when I suggested that her current ‘beau’ didn’t know a good thing when it was stood in front of him, that maybe she wasn’t this ‘good thing’ I was referring to! Ladies and gentlemen - please! Don’t buy into all that – you’re all amazing and if someone is too blind to see that then more fool them. One day they’ll wake up and realize exactly what a chump they’ve really been and that they’ve wasted their opportunity.*
Last night I went out on a ‘date’ – the first real ‘date’ I’ve ever been on in my life and my God was it terrifying. I didn’t even want to go – I was pretty sure I wasn’t mentally ready for it, but then again, ‘what’s the worst that could happen?’ I told myself. I can’t hang around forever for something that isn’t interested in ever coming back as much as it’s tempting to, and like I’ve let myself do so often in the past. No I thought, I need to do this.
On paper this guy was lovely – smart,
Now before we go any further, it’s important to note that in this case my first instincts were almost certainly correct. How do I know this? Well – because when that so often sought after lean in for the goodnight kiss arrived, those butterflies just weren’t there. Nope, it just wasn’t happening. And normally, that fact alone would have me running for the hills. But no, I thought – I’ve put myself out here, I’m giving myself a chance and I shouldn’t feel bad about that. My worst fears weren’t confirmed, in fact it was quite the opposite and if anything I might’ve found myself a new friend in the process and that’s nothing to get upset over.
I’m not one for new year’s resolutions and I haven’t gone in for all that this year either, but one thing I have promised myself is that I won’t give up on anything before I’ve even given it a try. You have to give things a chance – people yes, but also opportunities – don’t hold off on doing what you’ve always wanted to do for fear of embarrassment or rejection. Don’t wait until you’ve lost that extra 5lbs or until that job pops up again and you’ve got a little more experience – go for it now! Time waits for no one and if someone isn’t willing to accept you the way you are then screw them. We are our own biggest critics as it is, and so allowing anyone else into our lives that are willing to criticize the way we live them is the biggest mistake we can make.
Be bold, take chances, don’t hold off on telling people how you feel, because if you don’t take a risk, one day you’re going to end up losing out on what would have been the best thing to ever happen to you.
Sarah x
*LD – 30/01/15