Reebok Now Makin’ Bacon

By Nottheworstnews @NotTheWorstNews

Yahoo News Digest reports that the Reebok athletic wear company now makes bacon. It’s reportedly “free of nitrates, MSG, and sweeteners.”

Other companies are sweetening bacon? If we wanted sweet bacon, we’d invite Mrs. Butterworth’s to our bacon cottage parties.

3 Bacon Products We’d Like To See Reebok Make Other Than Bacon

1. Bacon shoelaces. They’ll tatter just like your regular shoelaces, but make you run faster as every salivating neighbourhood dog and wolf joins your next run through the park.

2. Bacon sweatshirts. Who doesn’t wish the sweaty person next to them on the treadmill at the gym smelled like bacon?

3. Bacon space shuttle. Hey, Reebok, you already left your wheelhouse making bacon, so why not make a bacon space shuttle? For anyone who has eaten spaceman food from a science center giftshop, this would at least make for better eats in space.