Poem entitled “Opiates”
Today is my 207th day being clean from opiates….A lot of people don’t know that about me and I hope me sharing this is not a mistake but I am tired of Hiding this demon that is constantly sitting on my shoulders.
Before I can be Honest with myself….I need to be honest with everyone else.
Clean veins secure the minds fall from grace
Failed attempts to escape the eternal thirst for one last taste
Often wishing life was a dream
normal is what I need not constant up and down extremes
Apologies heard but these actions can’t be redeemed
I punish my body again and again
death is uncanny but I continue to binge
toxins spread and the lying begins
quiet remorselessness I export into anger
Why do I treat my family like meaningless distant strangers
Answers are close but so very far away
Promises ignored, trust always betrayed
never admitting my true feelings of being afraid
I’ll use tomorrow but just not today