London gears up for the Jubilee. Photo credit: fmpgoh
The background
In case you hadn’t already heard, the weekend of 2 June will be the Diamond Jubilee of Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II. An occasion for celebration! For patriotism and pride! For outpourings of love and respect for the institution of the British Monarchy!
And also an opportunity for quick-witted merchandisers to cash in on the British public’s all-round patriotic hysteria.
For those for whom a spot of bunting and a commemorative cake stand is nice but just not enough, The Periscope Post brings you a suggested shopping list of somewhat tacky but also somehow appealing items of Jubilee merch.
Pass the sickbag
Too much excitement? Too many pork pies? Luckily a themed sick bag is on hand for when the Jubilee frenzy gets just too overwhelming. (www.lydialeith.com)
Wobbling like jelly with excitement
This 2-litre mold is perfect for creating a Pimms jelly for a street party. And it comes complete with a hook so you can hang it (creepily) on the wall afterwards. We’re not sure how treasonous this is … the proof will be in the pudding as you chow down on some Royal chin. (www.lydialeith.com)
Bentley Mulsanne: A right royal ride
Want to make a Royal entrance at the village hall this weekend? Then splash out on this delightful Bentley Mulsanne, complete with gold stitched headrests and cushions, and the same paint job as the State Limousine. There are only 60 available so move fast on this one.
Royal ink
These tattoos will last between 2 and 5 days: perfect for the Jubilee weekend. And dead classy, right? (www.lydialeith.com)
Revolutionary: Coronation chicken ice cream
‘Yum’ we hear you say. Upmarket London-based gelateria Gelupo is selling this leftfield creation in their Soho store and also online. (www.gelupo.com)
For long-standing monarchists
For the injured or elderly who want to stand for the national anthem this weekend. (www.coolcrutches.com)
For hungry crusties
Pizza Hut have released a limited edition version of their traditional stuffed crust called ‘The Crown Crust.’ Rumour does not have it that this is what the Royals will be eating at their Jubilee lunch on Tuesday.
The ultimate wallet reminder
The Jubilee celebrations may only last a weekend but you can be reminded of the good times each time you ride the Tube with this darling portrait Oyster card.
Smash the system
Republicans can take out their frustration with the monarchy whilst also releasing a shower of sweets for the kids with this crown-shaped piñata from Marks and Spencer.
Let them eat, err, bread
Why spend money on things you don’t need to celebrate the Jubilee? Go for the good old staple whilst still bringing in some Royal cheer with Kingsmill’s name-changed Jubilee ‘Queensmill’ loaf.