As the title of this post mentions, it’s Alan Ball’s turn to sit in the Penalty Box. I think it’s only fair. He has screwed us around long enough. As it is in hockey; punishment is handed out to those who break the rules and/or has been found to be guilty of crimes they shouldn’t commit. I’ll be playing the role of referee or judge, jury and executioner.
FIRST PERIOD:
Alan Ball gets it for saying this below;
“This season we wanted to stay away from “Who will Sookie choose?” ~Alan Ball, TV Guide Summer Preview Issue
Oh REALLY? I found this comment to be extremely funny, actually. If there was ever a person who has played the “team” thing more than any other, I can’t think of anybody. Alan Ball is the leader of playing “teams”. Oh right…he expects us to move on, just like Sookie, towards Alcide. *rolls eyes* Sure, he says there won’t be a “team” thing now…but you know that his words mean nothing. He has lied before – who says he isn’t lying now?
This calls for a 5 minute major for fighting. No, he’s not fighting with the fans himself…but it’s because of HIM, True Blood fans fight with each other. He’s the instigator so he gets another 2 minutes.
SECOND PERIOD:
Alan Ball gets it for saying this below;
Eric’s sister – they had the same maker, Godric, who met the true death – arrives to help her bro. Expect serious sibling…friction. “They don’t have the same boundaries that we do in human family arrangements,” Ball says with a laugh.
You remember that kiss in the first full season 5 teaser, where Eric is seen kissing another woman? I guess that is his “sister” Nora. While I do think Eric is the type of character who would typically move on from being dumped by Sookie, by switching back to the man he was before he met her – it still doesn’t make this nausea go away. I don’t want to see Eric move on from Sookie. For that matter, I don’t want to see Sookie move on with anyone else either. The fact Alan Ball LAUGHS about boundaries not being a matter in this, makes me want to shove my fist in his f*ckin’ face. Since he’s not here…I guess I’ll have to do the next best thing.
This calls for another 2 minutes for hooking. Hooking up two characters who don’t belong together and for making all of us here at Eric and Sookie lovers sick to our stomachs. I think he should also pay for all the booze we’ll have to drink during season 5 in order to get through all of this crap. Does he think we’ll find this interesting? Oh wait…he probably doesn’t even care what we think. *slaps head*
THIRD PERIOD:
Alan Ball gets it for…well, he never really said anything, but I definitely feel he deserves something for destroying the character of our beloved Sookie and for being a woman-hater.
Sookie on the show is NOTHING like her book counterpart. I won’t get into this here, because Nymerias pretty much covered all of it in her post here. As you know, Alan Ball has destroyed EVERY SINGLE FEMALE CHARACTER on the show. Tara, many of us hate her because she whines all the time. Jessica, okay, she’s not bad…yet, but to sleep with Jason put her on the same derailing track as the others. Pam, is another character Alan Ball has completely changed from her book counterpart. We still love her, but we hate how Alan Ball has turned her into someone who hates Sookie and broke up her close relationship with Eric. I will say this though…none of these women portray characters we (as fans) can relate to. It only proves my theory that Alan Ball hates women, or doesn’t understand them. I wish the female writers on his staff would stand up to him and tell him; ‘no, this is NOT how women are’.
This calls for a 10 minute game misconduct, and a four game suspension. And for added punishment…just because I’m a woman, and because I’m a b*tch…a slap shot to his ballsack. Shame on you, Alan Ball! I wonder if your mother knows how much you hate women? Shame on you for turning Sookie into a woman who resembles a wife who has been physically abused by her husband over the years. I hope Alan Ball’s husband-wife doesn’t let him call the shots in their relationship. Shame, shame, shame…
GAME OVER.
That’s the buzzer to end this edition of the Penalty Box! Rest assured, Alan Ball will be in here (image below) for the foreseeable future!
Any more penalties you want to add to this? Feel free to agree or add some more on in the comments below!