Parenting: My Expectations Vs. Reality

By Sassysweetstyle @ChaniaB

I don’t know if it was because I had horrible dating luck & just gave up on the idea or I truly thought I would be horrible at it, but for the longest time, I was solely career focused & never had the desire to get married or start a family.  All through college I worked with the public & then worked as a NICU nurse.  I knew people with children & of course interacted with children all of the time.  As a single, childless person, I SO ignorantly judged  other people’s children & their parenting. Boy am I ever paying for that now!

I met my husband & my world was turned upside down & am now a hypocrite in the best way possible.    When my daughter was born, I never thought I would feel so at home in the “Mother” role.  I have never felt so destined to be anything else before in my life.  She was a WONDERFUL infant.  She slept through the night at a month old, never had feeding issues, was SO happy & mellow. I would spend hours on Pinterest as she was sleeping, while I was waiting for my husband to come home pinning recipes, crafts & activities that I could do with her since she was such a well behaved child.

I would bake, get creative with cupcakes, make wreaths, tutus & various holiday themed age-appropriate crafts with her while she sat in her walker/high chair/pack in play & she would play & watch & smile at me the whole time.  It was amazing & I felt like supermom.

Then K turned 18 months old.

All of a sudden, my sweet, laid-back child turned into a demanding, impatient, fit-throwing beast.

Eating at a restaurant BEFORE:

Eating at a restaurant AFTER:

Necessity Shopping BEFORE:

Necessity Shopping AFTER:

Riding in the car BEFORE:

Riding in the car AFTER:

Daily interaction BEFORE:

Daily interaction AFTER:

My cookie cutter Mom fantasy burst into flames.  What happened with my child that changed her? Our home life was  EXACTLY the same.  All I could think of was that she was in the dreaded Terrible Twos early.  While they have decreased some , I am STILL dealing with DIVATUDE & she will be 3 in December.  I was hoping it would be over early since it started early, but there is no end in sight.  I get yelled at, have to pick her up off of the floors in stores, hit, snarled at & bossed around daily while picking up endless messes & trying not to lose it.   I have tried reasoning, calm conversations, taking things away, spanking, time-out, yelling & even locking her in her room for a few minutes as punishment.  NOTHING works.

Not wanting to be that mom who yells all of the time & loses it or stays in a corner rocking back & forth crying, I had to resort to medication to be more patient.  While it works most of the time, I still have my days where plenty of tears are shed & a bottle of Moscato is opened.

I know kids have good days & bad days, I just wish our good days outnumbered the bad.  She’s just an awesome singing, dancing, witty, intelligent & sassy little one when she is well behaved & having a good day.  I just have to keep trucking along & enjoy the good moments while they last.  Now please excuse me, I have been commanded to change another princess costume & to open a package as quickly as possible so she can pop the bubble wrap inside.  Life with a tiny dictator, le sigh.

How do/did your parenting expectations vs. reality differ?