Recently I was out with some girlfriends when the topic of long term marriages came up. We were talking about our grandparents and all of the years they've been married, many 60 or almost 70 years. One of us said, "Can you imagine?" We all chimed in with, "No." Each of us has been divorced and only some of us are currently in long term relationships. That's when one of the girls turned to me and said, "You have one of those 70 year marriages". She's right, I do.
We were in our mid 30's when we were married and will likely never live to see our 70th wedding anniversary but she's right. We have one of those marriages that will last forever. It brings tears to my eyes to think of how fortunate I am to have found this great love. A friend has been at her grandfather's bedside this week during his final days. Today she posted to facebook that her grandparents were spending quiet time together & wondered how you say goodbye after 67 years. It has me wondering what you say. The only words I can think that I would say to my amazing husband or precious sonish are "You made my life".
It's true. I was never one to think that someone else completes you or that someone else can bring you fulfillment. I'm a feminist to the core and have always believed that women should find self worth outside of their partnerships. I still believe that but what I know now is that without my two guys, my life would simply be incomplete. I'm more in love with them then I could have possibly been in the beginning. They simply are the greatest joys of my life. They have made my life.
How do I know I have a 70 year marriage? How do my friends know? They say they can see it in us. We're a matched set and we're madly in love but it's more than that. It's a connection, a love, a respect, a sense of continual gratitude, a passion for one another, and a willingness to work on it every single day no matter how easy or hard the day.
Why now? Why not with my first two husbands? My only answer is that this is where I was meant to be and what I was searching for all of my life. It's one of those things you can't put your finger on, you just know its there. These two are the only people I would sacrifice everything for, the only ones who matter that much to me. These two make me realize there is a God and a bigger purpose in this world. They are my world. They are my life.
I don't write this to brag but rather to share that it's never too late to seek the great love of your life. A dear friend in her 60's recently fell in love for what she now realizes is probably the first time. Will it happen for everyone? I don't know that but I know that what I have today was worth every minute of searching, every minute of learning lessons from bad relationships, and every minute of time that I thought had been wasted until now. Whether the future holds 70 years or something less than that, what I know is that there will never be enough "I love you's" or "Thank you's" to explain how much they mean to me. They are my gift. They are my life.