It's confession time.
I'll go first. But for starters, I won't mention any names or say where exactly I was when this occurred. I can tell you that this did actually happen. I'm not proud of it. But it happened.
While I was working for the "Caterer to the Stars" in Los Angeles, I also sometimes moonlighted, working for other catering companies when I had the time. At the time, there was an "on location" catering company that fed feature film crews, that I'd sometimes work with. One day they asked me to work for them at one of their important clients homes; a television show distributors house.
Between both companies, I'd been to this influential persons home more than a couple of times; to the point where I knew the layout of the house and pretty much what went where. Although this was the home of a multi-millionaire, aside from the size of the home, the square footage of the home - per se, it was a pretty house but was relatively ordinary.
However, first, the one thing that I distinctly remember was my first time seeing the custom playhouse the home owner had built for his child. Hollywood über-wealth bigwigs often have custom-built playhouses made for their children. And boy, was this playhouse was amazing. It's exterior was a duplicate of the owners actual house. It was a miniature replica of the clients home with everything, including air conditioning. And yes, we took a peek. We stuck our heads inside. In certain Hollywood circles, these types of playhouses are no big deal. You have the money. You have someone build an expensive playhouse for your kid. Another thing I remember about this palatial home was the workout room. It was separate from the house - talk about gorgeous. Was it ever luxed-out. What stood out about the workout room was it's gorgeous locker room. And, equipment-wise, you name it, they had it.
Carlo: photo by Johnny Phung
Let me tell you, I tried like hell to feel comfortable that day. But, I wasn't. I did a naughty thing after an accident occurred. What can I tell you? Except this... I was raised by an extremely moralistic mother, who had some hard rules about men... and specifically people's husbands. The naughty act probably wouldn't have happened if the fatcat rich guy, the husband that I thought was the man of the house, hadn't been hanging out in the kitchen - trying to talk to me, flirting with me while I was working. When I'd been there - the time before, he lived there. But what I didn't know was that he'd recently moved out. He and his wife were calling it "Splitsville". His attention was really uncomfortable for me. One of my bosses was right there the whole time, listening to every word that he spoke. It got me all flustered. He'd followed us from outside into the kitchen, casually talking to me. I didn't know that he and his soon to be ex-wife were amicably hanging out that day. Things kind of seemed like they were when I'd been there before; like they were together. Although, toward the end of the party, I did notice his wife talking a lot to a good looking guy that looked considerably younger. A few months down the road, after the naughty incident happened, the other company I worked for, the caterer to the stars, was hired to plan and cater his engagement party. He'd divorced his wife and eventually was planning to marry his pregnant secretary. Kind of figures, doesn't it? Isn't that "classic" and how it happens?
I tried to keep a conversation going with the catering guys, but they weren't much help. Intimidated by the rich guy, they had less to say to me than ever before. I thought to myself, Great. These guys aren't helping me. And "he" keeps talking to me - while they're all right here listening to every word he's saying and now I'm a nervous wreck.
At some point, someone from the catering company told me to be careful with the clients very expensive crystal stemware. Only a handful of the guests were using them; "certain people". I'd never broken anything, so I was confident that nothing bad would happen. The party had been out on their tennis court, but "he" followed me inside, parked himself right there in the kitchen, and watched every move I made while talking up a storm. He tried to distract what he was really doing (trying to flirt with me), by wagering "bets" over some game that he found to watch. with some of the male stragglers - "male groupies". Being a Mr.Money Bags-type, he had a few "phony bro's" who hung on his every word and laughed at anything he said that was supposed to be even slightly funny. So, he turned on the kitchen television, a TV that was recessed into the counter top,that popped up automatically via remote control. And, I'm uncomfortable because you'd had to have been a fool not paying any attention to not see his motives.
Some times passes and the next thing you know, the "naughty" occurrence happens. The unthinkable naughty thing mistakenly happened right there, when we were all in the kitchen area together. One of the very swanky crystal stemware broke. I was told that each glass cost over $300.oo each. So, of course they had to be hand washed. And wouldn't you know it. One broke right as I carefully dipped it into the soapy dishwater. It felt like my face almost fell off when it happened. But the men were so busy talking sports and guffawing over every word spoken by the multi-millionaire guy that no one noticed that it happened. All I could think was, Oh no! Now what am I going to do now? It was as if time stood still. I heard nothing but the stem break. Everything else was muted. I had no idea whether anyone said anything specific directly to me, or not. I was in my own freaked space in time. I was in a broken piece of expensive stemware trance.
Needless to say, I found a way to dispose of the broken glass via the trash compactor, kept working as if nothing happened, and finished shortly thereafter. And, I guess the wealthy guy, who had been talking and telling the guys about his relaxing time that he'd recently had at Canyon Ranch Spa thought I was stupid or crazy. I gave him nothing to work with after he's spent his time sitting in his soon to be ex-wife's kitchen, to get my attention. Eventually, he announced he was leaving. He got up from the table, complimented the chef/owners of the catering company, thanked all of us - looking at me and saying goodbye, and he left.
I haven't thought about this incident in years, but I do know that today I would handle the entire situation differently.
Oh and here's something else. When your're a man interested in the only woman in a room full of men (who happens to be there, working with her bosses), you might want to think of a way of creating an opportunity to speak to her, alone. Especially, when everyone is watching the two of you and listening to every word, knowing that your main reason for being there is to get her attention. The operative words for me during this entire situation were, uncomfortably nerve-wracking.
But enough about me. So, tell me. What did you do? The naughtiest thing you've ever done at a party was... what?
*****
I do this... I write to help to create to opportunities for all who choose to pursue their passion to have parties almost irregardless regard to economic constraints.
I think if we keep talking about the cost of parties (I write blog posts, you write comments), together, maybe we can break down some of the party industry's price barriers and shame some of the people who've taken your money and delivered a poor quality product right into growing a conscious and treating you right (nice thought, huh?).
Opportunities to be inspired about parties are everywhere. Yet, people looking out for your wallet are few and far between. My goal is to inspire you, causing you to question the way things are that have been the status quo for too long. When we stand together and speak up, we can be a powerful force.
Let's keep the conversation of change going. Because in the sea of everyone talking, one voice is a whisper... several voices are a scream.
Leave a comment and share your thoughts, ideas and suggestions below. Remember to be as specific as possible because what you have to say helps us all.
Always... be encouraged and encourage others too,
“You’re imperfect, and you’re wired for struggle, but you are worthy of love and belonging.” - Brené Brown
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