To Nancy Ann Francis Cook, my mom:
It has been fifteen years since you lost your battle with lymphoma. You were such a brave fighter. We knew when you were diagnosed that you were going to die, but somehow we all thought you would be able to overcome it. For three years you went through every procedure and test imaginable. I remember donating some of my platelets to you in the hope that you would not reject them, but it didn’t work.
It was really hard for me to say goodbye to you. It is still hard. I miss you so much. You taught me so much. I was fortunate to be the youngest of your four children, because I got to stay home with you when my siblings were off to school. It was just you and me, and Ark Linkletter on the radio! I still remember the little radio on the kitchen counter, and how we used to listen to him as we did chores around the house.
I always admired how strong you seemed to be for us when dad died. You must have been a wreck, but you were able to keep us all together. I know that in some ways your life was better without Wade, but I also know that he was the love of your life and that no one else would do for you.
I remember everything about our house on Lincoln Street. I remember how you kept it, and how it was decorated. I remember with fondness the sign above the sink, “Bless This Mess”. As a kid, I thought it was tacky and I sometimes hated it. I had to do a lot of growing up before I realized the values and the lessons you were always trying to teach with your humility and unpretentiousness.
You were so intelligent. I really admired your ability to know something about everything. You were an avid reader, and you read to me. I still love reading and I have you to thank for it. You had a great smile, and I know that it gives you pleasure in heaven to know that you have a granddaughter, whom you never met here, that has your same smiling eyes.
Forgive me mom, for not thanking you for all the sacrifices you made for me. The braces and the trips to the orthodontist. The things you did without so that I could have a new ski coat and be in the Ski Club. I thought it was so important. Forgive me for not thanking you publicly when I won all those awards in high school and when I spoke to my classmates at graduation.
I forgive you for the times when you could not be there for me. For the times I felt neglected and unimportant. For the advice and direction you could not give. For not being there for me when I went to college, alone and afraid.
You gave me your best and I am grateful for it.
I love you. Your son, Bill