According to the news and from your own experience, you must know that male and female brains are different. Of course, all couples get angry and argue, no matter how long they've been together. And the brain's 'hard wiring' can impact how they fight.
However, you can develop skills to soothe yourself and calm your partner. If you take some responsibility for what's going on and are willing to compromise, that may help minimize bad feelings and resentments on both sides.
In the midst of a heated argument, any one of these comments would be welcomed by someone who is feeling misunderstood: I might be wrong, stay with me and don’t withdraw, I see my part in all of this, let’s find a common ground I love you and we'll work through this.
Arguments are less destructive if you've built up a reserve of shared positive feelings and interactions. You can draw on this emergency supply in times of conflict. To create emotional dividends, try something as simple as connecting daily. Leave your partner an affectionate text message or express appreciation for a kind gesture.
Dr. Jeffrey B. Rubin recently published THE ART OF FLOURISHING, which integrates meditative, psychotherapeutic and yogic practices to show readers how to thrive and live well, even in times of upheaval. You'll learn how to broaden the scope of your own well-being while deepening your intimate relationships.
You may be interested in reading a couple of his articles: Winning in a Relationship is a Losing Strategy in the Huffington Post http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jeffrey-rubin-phd/winning-in-a-relationship_b_874470.html
and How Anthony Weiner Might Save His Marriage in Psychology Today. http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-art-flourishing/201106/how-anthony-weiner-might-save-his-marriage
In the fall, Dr. Rubin will be featured on our Virtual Book Tour. In the meantime, learn more about Flourishing at drjeffreyrubin.com.