The words of my senior was now playing in my mind “they don’t care if we are their Muslim brothers or not. They will just extract all information whichever way possible and then execute us. What u need to keep in mind that u will be shaheed, martyrdom. It is the highest status a Muslim can achieve in the eyes of Allah. There is nothing more I have to say to you. May Allah be with us at all times”We had planned to attack this terrorist faction. It was causing much distress in the area of Sawat. We had intended a raid but before we could put our strategy to action, we were attacked and as far as I know I had been taken in captive. Our troops were all well aware of the details of the location of this faculty and possible hiding points. This was that bleak ray of hope that had kept me sane up till now.
I wondered what Ayesha would be going through at this moment. How would she ever be able to take the news of my demise? How would she ever be able to raise my Maryam all on her own? How could I just leave everything behind? I closed my eyes and the image of my darling Maryam came into view. Her bright green eyes, golden locks, her smile; she was without a doubt an angel. I started to cry.
There were sudden voices of cracking something open and then a light. I felt myself being raised from the ditch and thrown down on the ground. I was blindfolded. My stomach twisted inside. A hard itching lump caught my throat. Breathing became difficult. I was picked up again and dragged around; I couldn’t keep track of the directions. Then I came to a halt and was made to stand with this where my whole body was tied to a vertical log. It was about to begin.When my blind fold was removed I was revealed to an unanticipated sight. There were no question answers to be held, no extraction of precious valuable information, nothing. But I had always imagined this scene to be different. I would be tied to a chair with a bright flash light directly pointing on my face, a mulla reciting a few lines of the Quran saying how I had sinned, abused the holy divine word of Allah and how I should be penalized and with all this taking place, one person filming this very scene after which a heavenly blade is brought which is used to slit my throat. But again to my surprise, I was just an object for target practicing.
A familiar sound met my ears once again, the very same one that had welcomed me to this wretched hell, that which had brought me back from my partial slumber the very same one to which my eyes had opened in that underground cellular compound.
“Allahu Akbar *Allahu Akbar-Allahu Akbar *Allahu Akbar”They had their faces covered with checkered cloth, their hair wild like a mad man, guns pointed directly to me, all AK47s, and ammo strapped to their bodies“Ash-hadu al-la ilaha illa llah*Ash-hadu al-la ilaha illa llah”There was still hope, my troops knew where I was being held and my fellow brothers will come for me. Allah will help me. I have always been a good person I have always obediently followed all obligations set my Allah. Allah will for surely help me.“Ash-hadu anna Muħammadan rasulullah* Ash-hadu anna Muħammadan rasulullah”What would happen to my beloved Ayesha and my angel Maryam? Who would be there to help them, who will be there to support them? How can I just let go of my ladies, the noor of my eyes.”Hayya 'ala-salah* Hayya 'ala-salah”I had started to panic. The burden of this scenario had too much pressure on me. I couldn’t keep going like this. Everything was now spinning haphazardly. I tightly closed my eyes.“Hayya 'ala 'l-falaħ* Hayya 'ala 'l-falaħ”The words AYESHA escaped my lips, for the last time maybe. I could feel a tear drop trickling down my cheek.“Allahu akbar”And there it was, the sound of Ak47s being fired. Eyes still tightly shut. What had happened?“La ilaha illallah”