Karwachauth ,A Festival Celebrating Love

Desi Valentine ,an expression of love and an augmentation of  spiritual strength.
A community festival celebrating married life and husband's love and extensive shopping and saaj shringaar .-just the  art of dressing up to the nines in outfits one wouldn't normally wear-the wedding dress if one can fit into it or stand the retina fatigue(Indians have this infinite love for bling...so!) or something to give competition to the wedding dress.
It must be red or hot pink or any other bright color and lots of gold blingy stuff on it.
OK,reason....
Many legends and stories.
But essentially ,a day to fast for the long life of the husband,get pampered ,feel special once again and have a wonderful day.
Prep begins a few days before-the outfit. Bling is in.
Bangles, jewelry and the works.
The day before ,the shopping for the food.
Sargi is traditionally a meal that is made by the mother in law for her fasting daughter in law. And for those of us,whose mothers in law don't live in the same house or are unable to send stuff to eat,we shop ourselves.
Methi Mathi(Sweet Fried Mathi) Pheeki Mathi(No salt or sugar mathi) Feni(something akin to sevain or fried angel haired pasta),fruit,dry fruits ,sweets like barfi,laddoo etc and  Fresh coconut . And of course some make up ,clothes,bindis,bangles and sindoor or the vermilion powder etc. All that to ensure that a married woman looks married.

google images

And we,the daughters in law,on behalf of our parents give a gift called baya to the mothers in law.This may be dry fruit and money or jewelry or clothes or whatever-basically a lot of love and gratitude that she handed over hubby dear to you and now he is yours.
We wake up at 4 am the day of the fast. Some families wash their hair and some do that after the sargi. We break the coconut,offering the prashad to the goddess and set some aside for the pandit who will conduct the pooja in the evening. Only then we sit down to eat.Basically ,freshen up and eat a little bit of the sargi for the fast and drink as much water as you can. I avoid the fried stuff as that makes you thirsty through out the day and instead eat a sandwich made of cottage cheese or vegetables. Simple logic, protein keeps you happy longer. I also pop in a pain killer. To avoid the impending headache.All water intake to stop before daybreak.Then go back to sleep and wake fresh.Mehendi or henna can be applied the day before or on the day.                                         We play tambola or Bingo , watch a movie or go shopping.This year ,I'm shopping-Alone! Save my energy by not talking.The men folk and kids fend for themselves on this day. The focus is on getting dressed and pretty for the community pooja before 4 pm. All the women gather around a pandit who recites a story or katha , we pass our pooja thalis around 7 times and sing this song.The pooja thali has a karwa or a glass  of water,some rice, sweets ,the baya or gift for the mother in law and a diya or lamp that we make with whole wheat flour dough.The lamp is made with dough and filled with desi ghee or clarified butter with a wick and placed in a small katori or bowl to hide the imperfections.This lamp is to be lit at the time of the pooja.This video has the song and the story .
Karva is the glass or container or an earthenware pitcher that has the water. Veero is the name of the married girl in the story and she is asked to buy the karva so that she can pray to Goddess  Parvati for her husbands long life.The story talks about the sister of seven brothers and her love for her husband.The brothers are not too happy to see their sister thirsty and hungry ,so they lite a fire a little distance away and fool the sister into believing that the moon has risen.She breaks her fast and gets news that her husband is dead.She nurses her husband to life but he awakens to see the maid instead of his wife and believes her to be his loved one.She prays to goddess Parvati and her husband realises who his wife is and they live happily ever after.
All the women get together and sit in a circle singing the song and telling each other the story. The song the married women or Veero to not step into the fields today and do no work, not to spin the charkha to spin thread, not to wake those who are sleeping or try to convince those who are sulking to be happy again.Six times this is sung and then in the seventh time all restrictions are lifted. Do whatever you are supposed to as a woman of the house.
After the pooja, some ladies drink water or tea or whatever they have been drinking from the first fast. I never drank anything, so will not break any tradition. We wait for the moon . This moon surely ensures we wait. Always late.
The pooja thali now with the rice ,sweets ,some flower petals and the karwa or glass of water and a sieve and the husband at the ready.
Looking at the moon through the sieve,we women pray to the shining moon for the long life and health of the husbands,offering some of the water from the karwa,the rice and the sweets, we turn to face the husband and look at him through the sieve. The same offerings are made to him and he then offers the first sip of water to his loving wife to break her fast.
My secret is a glass of chilled fizzy Coke or Pepsi and then a light meal.
The meal is also a predicted menu,the same for ever.
Maa ki daal ,Aaloo Gobi and Boiled Rice.
Spiritual strength of a woman is so obvious. No water the whole day.
But,its all for a just cause.
The husband.
So if you are married and Indian ,go enjoy the festivities. If you are not either,come along anyways and enjoy the madness.
May the husbands live a long and happy life, and may there be happiness,always.