I considered long and hard before deciding on this month's plant of annoyance. I realised that it had self-nominated as it was the plant I stood (squatted) in front of most often in recent weeks in a pleading sort of way. Dear reader, I present this month's irritating plant, the 2017 Blackberry Garden 'Plant of the Year' Award winner, it is no other than Galanthus Madeline.
At the time I took this photograph you can see that Madeline is swimming in a puddle. Before you all point and go 'aha! you planted her in a flood plain, no wonder she is not flowering', I can assure you that the puddle is unusual and is the outcome of the recent weeks and weeks of rain. Maybe it has not helped, maybe it is not relevant. I do not know, what I do know is that whilst there are leaves there are no beautiful yellow capped snowdrop flowers.
She flowered two years ago, she was beautiful then. She is beautiful now but lacking in flowers. I look at the amount of leaves that have come up and take some heart that there are quite a lot of them. I wonder if she does flower next year if I will get three flowers. Then all will be forgiven and she may win an award again (yes this is an attempt at bribery, shush).
Of course I do think I know why she has not flowered, I think I upset her. In 2018 I planted her into the garden and then promptly dug her up again as I thought I might be moving house. Then I replanted her and she threw her hands up in the air, muttered far more french sounding swear words than is reasonable for a sleeping snowdrop and has promptly sulked. When Madeline became french I am not entirely sure, but from now on she is officially french and her language preferences have been duly noted.
I whisper words of love to her (in poor french) and tell her I will not disturb her again. Let's hope a year of more peaceful sleeping will do her good.