As much as I love blogging, I have to admit that writing does not come naturally to me, I am not a good writer, let alone in English. Or at least that's my excuse for not writing as often as I should in 2015.
I missed blogging about the excitement of moving out of Qatar, I missed blogging about being a nomad or basically I just didn't blog for the second half of last year. I have a few excuses off course: too busy packing, too busy cleaning up my previous apartment, too busy in the office.... then what?
As soon as all the crazy activities were over, I should of had all the time in the world to do blogging and more writing. There should have been no more routine to do the office job, or even house chores, which meant lots of time to do other things that I've been wanting to do. Yet here I am, two and a half months plus a week into the New Year I am still struggling to start blogging again.
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I always say to myself, that I blog before I do photography; I always thought that my photographs were to complement my stories. But soon after it becomes the core of my stories. It helps me memorise what I've seen along the way of my travels. I become an avid passionate "photographer".
I don't want to,
I don't have to,
you can't make, I am retired!
Am I still an avid photographer? I felt the photography activity also came to a halt. I always thought that as I don't have to go to work anymore and carry on traveling, I will have all the time to do whatever I want to do whenever I want to do it. Yet, time passed quickly and here I am a week into the new year and still struggling to find the time to do my personal 'job'.
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It's almost 6 months into my retirement life, yet I felt I could not find any rhythm to the new life. Or am I too engrossed with the slogan of "I don't want to, I don't have to, you can't make me, I am retired!", and that makes me think that I don't have to do anything anymore...
May be I should think that I can do what I want at my own speed...? But then, time does't wait for me.....
I miss my routine... the routine of going to work, the routine to do things at a certain time and the ability to plan ahead instead of impulsive ways of spending each day.
I guess I have to work on a new habit, a new lifestyle. Until then it will be hard to find a proper time to do all the things that I used to do and be productive.