I enjoyed reading this article about what it means to cast Lindsay Lohan in your movie. Lindsay Lohan is inherently interesting. Disaster and beautiful, when they come in the same package, are intriguing. But it didn’t satisfy me. It’s not like I was surprised to hear that Lindsay shows up late, frequently drunk, and acts like a diva. I wanted to learn something new about her—like she does a great money shot, or has warts on her feet, or spray painted her entire house gold, or adopted seventeen chimpanzees. I’d love to even just to read the salacious and pathetic personal histories of her myriad assistants.
In any case, this movie is probably going to be terrible—another version of American Psycho, Bret Easton Ellis, really?—but I will definitely go see it. And rock on, LiLo. I’ll wait for your comeback until the day you die. Which actually, given that your antics aren’t half as bad as say, my little sister, won’t be any time soon.