I sit at my computer editing photos and look over to see him, only it's his hands I see and a Lego catalog covering most of his self. He studies. I am inspired.
It is Saturday morning around 7am. I wake and hear the softest of voices coming from their room. I find them together in Theo's top bunk with Big Bear nestled between them, playing a game. I melt a little.
It was just yesterday and I was back on my computer editing while he watched Franklin's Soccer Adventure, his quiet-time choice. I looked at him and left what I was doing, in need of some snugs and to smell the top of his head. For some reason, smelling their heads is my drug and I find myself needing a permanent fix. I want to smell that smell forever. Sunlight and outside and cozy sheets and sweet, honeyed lavender. Pure child and boy and a pulse that thumps with my own.
He hopped out of the car at school and I looked down to see his feet. But what I really saw was life, alive and well.
Taking photographs and writing are what I am meant to be doing. It's taken me a while and many creative paths and jobs to realize that this is exactly what I want to do with my life. I am not sure what lies ahead, but I do know that I will forever be a writer and a photographer. I will be one who documents life and tells a story about it. Yes. One year ago, I couldn't have typed that out with such strength behind myself. I wasn't sure I could own that truth because I did not go to school to learn how to write or take pictures, which made me think somewhere, somehow, I wasn't deserving of those titles for myself.
When I made this choice to call myself A Writer, A Photographer, I put my soul in the process; something I don't believe I've ever truly shown up to do except for when I took on the role of mothering. I am proud of what I'm doing and so so grateful for my friends and family that support me. Writing here like this worries me a little, I'll be honest. Happiness is humbling and writing about it feels a little bit scary. What I do wish to get across is the hope that you will also follow your heart and pursue your real calling, no matter what.
My photography, elsewhere:
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I'm super excited to announce the winner of the Mama's Gonna Snap giveaway.
DevonWhat a great idea for a class! I've shied away from taking a class because I don't have a lot of free time, but online sounds like a great way to do it.
Devon, you can email Meghan at meghan@gatheringlightphoto.com and she'll take it from there. For everyone who emailed and said they thought the class sounds awesome and would love to take it but next week isn't a good time, Meghan is offering the class again in January. You can email her to get on the priority wait list for upcoming classes.
Thank you to everyone and for putting up with the wacky commenting (or lack of) experience. And huge Thanks! to Meghan for offering such an inspiring class.