Parenting is one of the toughest jobs in the world. Sometimes parents get so overwhelmed with it, that they tend to lose their temper and yell at their children. Do not feel guilty or beat yourself about it. It is normal for a person to go through bouts of anger. No parent sits and plans pr schemes to yell at their children, it all happens suddenly. Children do try and test their parent’s patience. However yelling and screaming at them can cause psychological damages for the children. Children learn a lot from their parents during their early childhood. Your yelling and screaming will teach them the wrong approach to resolve issues in the future. What is worse is they may end up doing the same thing.
Here are some tips that can help you control your anger at the worst times:
Take a deep breath and drink water-This may sound clichéd but it does help to a great deal. When you know that you’re going to blow up just step away to get a glass of water. Take deep breaths and come back to composure. However do not let the reason for your anger slide. Once you know that you’re not going to scream, sir down and have a talk with your child about what upset you. Sometimes discussing your feelings with the children will help them grow up into more mature beings.
Predict the yelling pattern-There will be certain times of the day when you feel like yelling more. Rush hour traffic, early morning chores can get on to your nerves. So start planning ahead to resolve the problems. For example if you find it difficult to get your child out of the bed and get ready for school, use a different approach. Get the things that they need for school ready in the night. Put an alarm by their bed side and make sure the alarm cannot be switched off.
Be adjusting-It is not possible to have things work your way at all times. Some days will be bad and some worse. Learn to laugh about the experiences on those days. For example if your child missed the school bus, make a conscious effort to smile and drop them off at the school. This can actually give your child a huge message that they are wrong. If you adjust very now and then, the children will learn the same thing and reciprocate.
Be enforcing and not forcing-Never force your child to do something or else he or she will become a rebel. Instead try to enforce the habits you would like to inculcate in them. Do you keep saying the same things over and over again? Like drink your milk, for example. Your child heard you the first time and may deliberately not do it. Use a different approach instead. Sit down with your cup of coffee along with your child’s glass of milk. Have a conversation while you both are having your beverages.
There is a sensible solution for most parenting problems.