A friend who lives in the center of Florence came over for dinner the other day. We got to talking about tourists. "I can't take it anymore," she said.
"Just getting out the front door has become a problem... then you stand in line for hours to buy a loaf of bread, the prices are ridiculous, everyone speaks English to you. The last time I ate at the local trattoria, which I have been going to for years, we barely put our forks down when the owner made it clear that he needed our table."
Although Italy's anti-tourism protests aren't yet as big as in Spanish hotspots like Barcelona or Mallorca, the rumblings have already begun. In Venice, my wife recently snapped a photo of a graffiti scrawled with the text "+ DEAD TOURISTS," and our Florentine friend confirms that similar slogans have appeared there.
In several Italian cities, neighborhood associations have taken action against the wave of short-term rentals that has become a whole historical centre transforming neighborhoods into tourist-only zones, making long-term rents unaffordable for all but the very wealthiest residents.
While it may not make a difference to all grumblers, it certainly doesn't hurt to show that you're aware of local culture, customs, and sensitivities. girlfriend fiorentina is a Brit who has lived in the city for decades. Her objection to the invasion is partly the numbers, it's true - but also the way the civilised visitors of old seem to have been replaced by what she calls "hordes of badly behaved Instagrammers".
What follows is a short vademecum for British visitors to Italy who not only avoid hostile stares but hopefully encourage genuine interaction with the locals. That is - or should be - what holidays are all about.
Be friendly
Just say " Good day" or " pleased " to people whenever you get the chance. Whether you're walking into a store, passing someone on a walkway, or trying to convince a traffic cop to let you off your speeding ticket, those two little words make a big difference.
Good day is always good for lunch, pleased afterwards. And they function as both hellos and goodbyes.
Keep moving
Don't sit on bridges in Venice. In this car-free, bike-free city, where foot and boat are the only means of transport, it's like sitting on the M1. Less dangerous perhaps, but just as antisocial.
Adopt the coffee culture
Don't order a cappuccino or other milky coffee at the end of a restaurant meal. For Italians, coffee after every meal except breakfast should be black, preferably espresso (which, to complicate matters, is not labeled " an espresso"in Italy - it's just" a cup of coffee ").
This may seem like a ridiculous rule, but then so does the strange British veto on adding ice cubes and a slice of lemon to your pint of bitter. You may like it, but it's just not meant to be.
Listen to the locals
Change the settings on your favorite restaurant review site to "Italian Reviews Only." You may not understand what's written, but if there are enough reviews, the reviews themselves are telling and will help guide you to places that are popular with locals rather than tourists.
And when you find that local trattoria, and you see a menu that's only in Italian, be glad. Delegate the translation to your smartphone, or the waiter, or even better, someone at the table next to you - they'll probably tell you not only what the dish is, but whether it's good.
Have cash on hand
Make sure you have some euros with you. Non-cash transactions can now be done almost everywhere in Italy, but you need to be prepared for the exceptions. It can be a mountain restaurant who after a long walk looks like a mirage, a ceramic artist whose work you fall in love with, or a taxi without which you will never catch the train.
If you're in Italy for a week, you'll use those two €50 bills in your wallet. Make them a mix of 20s and 10s, because no one ever has change.
Wait well
Don't panic if you see a seemingly random mass of people waiting to be served rather than an orderly queue. Italians are just as intolerant of push-pulls as the British, but they operate a different system - one where they actually talk to each other. Whether at the doctor's or at a market stall, it's common for the newest arrival to ask: " What's the latest? " - "Who's last?" Problem solved.
Act like an adult
Don't try to swim across the Grand Canal in Venice, don't pretend to be gladiators in the Colosseum, and don't climb on statues in Florence to perform sexual acts, as a drunken tourist recently did.
If you do, don't expect local police to adopt the same lenient attitude as former Italian Culture Minister Vittorio Sgarbi, who dismissed the young woman's act as an "amorous indulgence".
Leave the spray alone
Impress baristas by trying something a little different than the standard tourist aperitif drinks: the Aperol Spritz or Campari Spritz.
Other pre-dinner drinks are also available, such as the Hugo, a refreshing mix of prosecco and elderflower, or the negroni bagliated - a lighter version of the classic Negroni, with prosecco instead of gin.
Even in the spritz department, you can score kudos points by asking for a spritz with cynar (an artichoke-based amaro) or a select spritz. With the emphasis on the first syllable - SELL-ect - this recently relaunched sweet liqueur lays claim to being the original Venetian spritz mixer.
To decorate
Don't take your shirt off in Italian cities unless you're a local construction worker or on the beach.
Note the windows
Be patient with the air conditioning. You have the right to keep it cool inside when it's 98 degrees outside, but don't expect to live in a refrigerator. If you really want your Airbnb host to love you by saving the planet and their electric bill, learn about natural air conditioning.
If you open doors and windows during the day, it will only get warmer inside. Keep the windows and shutters closed during the day and open them in the cool at night. But always close both when you go outside. As Vivaldi Four Seasons teaches that even on the most beautiful summer day a thunderstorm can occur out of nowhere.