As I wake up and yawn, still groggy and battling the sleeping dust (Rheum) pulling my eye lids together, I stretch before and reach out for my Mac. In the still of the early morning a certain peace fills the atmosphere. I look over and find Mrs.B sound asleep with her tiny mouth slightly agape, before returning to my mail and NBA news. Moments later her tiny body shifts before she wakes and stretches. I reach across to hug her when she pushes me back. I assume she needs some time to get her bearings but the cold-shoulder treatment continues.
'What's wrong?' I ask.'Nothing!' She snaps.'What happened? Did I wake you?''No!' 'Then?''You know what.' She mutters through gritted teeth.'What happened?''You know exactly what! I'd never do that to you!''That what?' I whine in genuine confusion.'That girl you were flirting with, I'd never do that to you. I don't even talk to guys and you go and flirt with the bloody girl right in front of me!'
Silence dawns upon the bedroom and all we can hear is the sounds of the birds chirping from the window. Rage blankets her fair face as her tiny nostrils continue to flare with each venomous breath. I turn to her and softly ask;
'What girl?''That bloody girl. The blonde yesterday by the....' She pauses before turning and looking at me. Tears begin to form in her eyes as she covers her mouth.'What?' I ask again. 'Where? What blonde?'
'It was a dream!' She spews in between the cackling. 'I got confused by the dream!'
Marriage tip 30:Stay faithful, in this and every other world!
Welcome to my surreal married life!