Grand Mirage Resort & Thalasso Bali : Review

By Parentalparody @parental_parody
As I sit at home writing this review it is cold, very cold.  It's also overcast and we're expecting rain any minute now.  Obviously this means The Feral Threesome have reached maximum feralocity, like caged animals, because we are stuck indoors.
In stark contrast, this is what I'm thinking about:
Just a hint of cloud cover, maximum sunshine, and fantastically warm.  So warm that cocktails are mandatory - for fluid replenishment.
Snap back to reality, and as The Feral Threesome attempt to enact Natural Selection upon each other, this is what I'm fondly remembering: Best. Kids. Club. Ever. But when is a Kids Club not totally awesome? And while I fobbed The Feral Threesome off onto someone else to entertain and enrich, I put my time to good use by getting outdoors in the sunshine and soaking up some culture and sampling local produce: Again, back to reality - and as I sit here now contemplating what to cook for dinner, again (I swear I just did this yesterday? And the day before that. And the day before that), my mouth is watering from memories of this:

Breakfast in bed, room service style. Is there anything better?

Sand underfoot, ocean over yonder, BBQ seafood platter. Worth getting out of bed for.


All without having to chop, cook or clean up.
Insert blissful sigh.
Personal highlight - La Cascata restaurant. Start with the amazingly moreish olive tapenade, an entree of the sublime Pumpkin Soup (I even know the secret ingredient that makes it so much better than any other pumpkin soup...but I'm not telling), then the best rack of New Zealand lamb I've ever tasted, and finish off with the Tiramisu.
Almost enough to be guilted into entering the gym once my gluttonous euphoria wore off.  Almost.

This is as close as I actually got to the gym. Those No Entry warning stickers were for me. I swear.

Aussie Executive Chef, Matthew Wood, is clearly gastronomically gifted.  Normally I rely on Macca's hotel delivery for The Feral Threesome's dinner while in Bali, as I scramble to get ready for cocktail o'clock - but they happily ate...wait for it...GRILLED VEGETABLE SKEWERS! Every. single. night.  I was beside myself with smugness over the vege goodness they were consuming.
So naturally I celebrated with a couple of frozen cocktails.
It goes without saying that The Feral Threesome have refused the same veg ever since we got home. Typical...
In conclusion.... All inclusive value #1Hubby was painfully skeptical about the whole all inclusive deal.  No matter how many times I reminded him that I used to be a travel agent, and I was well versed in the fine print and what was included - he was sure we'd be hit with a bill when we checked out.  A bill so extensive we would be forced to leave me behind to stay until we could afford to pay it off, heh. Sadly, no bill, no extended holiday for me. Staff The staff are brilliant.  Seriously.  The Balinese are the nicest people on earth, and The Grand Mirage employs some of the best.  We were always greeted by name, and regularly asked if there was anything they could do to make our stay more relaxing and enjoyable. Accommodation The rooms are large and spacious.  The beds are heavenly and huge.  The towels are changed TWICE A DAY. Location The beachfront location means all views are spectacular, and the grounds and gardens are lovely.
Food Don't even get me started on the food.  After a week we hadn't managed to eat our way through everything on the menus at the various dining options.  Obviously we must return to finish the job, right? Drink The cocktails are cold and plentiful.  In a word: Mojito. Family-friendly The Feral Threesome are still asking when they're going back to the Kids Club.  The staff were brilliant with them.  The Kids Club is a great break for parents, and there's zero parental guilt about leaving them in there as the Club has activities scheduled throughout the day. The verdict I would swap my drab, winter's day at home for The Grand Mirage Resort & Thalasso Bali in a heartbeat. Thank you Grand Mirage.
Best blogging review opportunity ever!
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