Fear Diversions

It’s really been a struggle to write lately, and I’ve blamed it on everything but myself. Kids’ homework, husband’s work schedule, appointments, phone calls, housework, laundry – the list goes on and on. While these things do compete for my time and attention, I’ve discovered only this week how much I have given place to them recently, allowing them to impact my work schedule much more than usual. I used to be so regimented, but lately I haven’t been wise with my time, and I’ve failed to create and meet goals. Why the sudden change?

Fear Diversions!

After a time of serious introspection and soul-searching, I realized that I’ve allowed the mundane to overshadow my productivity because I’m afraid. After starting my first book, I began reading about the publishing process. The superfluous lists of expectations and advice have stacked up tall in my brain, hemming me in and causing me to look for a way of escape. Although lackluster, these ordinary distractions have provided diversion from the possibility of failure and fear of the unknown.

In allowing avoidance to gain entrance through the everyday, I have sanctioned fear’s presence and authorized it to take root. Now, I must not only weed out fear, but also tend to the areas overgrown, pruning to find the courage and purpose once cultivated. What seemed liked simple diversions are now recognized as the crippling devices they are.  Through a little rearranging and a lot of reassessing, I have come to appreciate the danger of such distractions and have purposed to stay focused on the goal. I will probably always struggle with fear, but I do not have to let it win, stifling creativity and keeping me from a life-long dream.

Has this ever happened to you? Have you allowed the ordinary to keep you from your purpose because of fear of failure or rejection? What do you do to get back on track?