I feel bad today… it is so weird to have feelings and have no idea why you are feeling the way you are feeling.
I am scared to understand the reasons behind the feelings
…the truth behind my nightmares
I am scared to face myself
I do not want to believe that anything bad ever happened
This blissful ignorance cannot seem to overshadow the memories hiding in the back of my mind
That disorients my logical thought process
I don’t know how to handle my pain
I don’t know how to express the truth
I don’t know how to hide from the guilt any longer
I feel bad about my body
I feel I want to be a better person
I fear I have lost trust in humanity
I don’t understand how there can be such evil
my heart grows cold and numb
Little girl dreams of fairy tales because the truth of the matter is
She lost hope in love
The men she sees are monsters
I am filled with hate
Filled with rage
At the injustice
That broke me…