Designated Shitting Streets

Posted on the 20 August 2015 by Calvinthedog

This is a repost of a very popular piece on here that ran recently. A comment on this post by Shi is the basis for the previous post. Some of you may have missed it; others may enjoy a reread. Have fun.

An Internet Hindu tries to defend Bharat Mata by arguing that Indians do not shit on your average Indian street. Instead, they actually do so on designated shitting streets. LOL.

I am wondering who designated these streets to be designated shitting streets anyway? The town or city? The county? The state? The national government? The police? The health department, assuming there even is one.

Or was it just done by local consensus, say a bunch of Indians get together and say, “Hey, let’s designate Elephant Jockey Street as a designated shitting street? What do you say?”

“But why Elephant Jockey Street? That’s a major thoroughfare!”

“Yeah, thoroughfare for beggars and hustlers! That place is three turdlets short of a pantload! Hell, it could use some more poop on it! Nothing but curryniggers on Elephant Jockey Street anyway.”

“Hey! Who you calling a currynigger?”

“Not me. Not you. We’re Honorary Aryans, remember? Don’t you remember 3,500 years ago when we came sweeping down off the steppes on horse-drawn chariots? I remember it like yesterday!”

“Yeah ok. Screw those curryniggers. Elephant Jockey Street it is! EJ Street is now a Designated Shitting Street!”

“Yay!”

“Yay!”

“Three cheers for EJ Street!”

“Three poops for EJ Street!”

“Jai Hind!”

“Jai Hind!”

You know you live in a great, modern, up and coming First World industrialized Superpower when you have actual Designated Shitting Streets. I mean Third World countries are so backwards they don’t even have those. You can just squat on any old lane and dump a load on the sidewalk and walk away like nothing happened. How primitive!

By the way, here is Poo, India. At first I thought Poo was the real name for the whole shitty country and they just called it India to be polite, but instead it’s just the name of one shitty little town.