Depression

By Colloquial Wordsmiths
Seconds ago, I was in my room Seconds ago, I was looking at the ceiling But now I feel lost I forget where I am The cracks on the ceiling blurred And my ears start to drown In pain concentrated water Minutes ago, I heard people laughing outside my room Minutes ago, I felt warmth peeking from my window But now I feel cold and alone I close my eyes and try to focus But it’s too late I’m losing my hold I shiver and freeze as memories creep in The light starts to flicker And the past played without mercy Hours ago, I was hoping for a tomorrow Hours ago, I was hoping to live once more But now I feel the world crumbles Little by little the walls move closer Voices in my head starts to scream And once again my sanity left me To fend off alone in this horror Weeks ago I accepted a hand to help me Months ago I could still hear my mom’s plea But now I don’t remember anymore Why I fought for another day Is it for me? is it for them? For a battle I can’t fight off? Or for me to witness loss over and over? For me to bear the pain for eternity? To live the curse I was bestowed with? Years ago I lost hope and regain them And now I lose it all again I stand up and move to the window Watch people around me laughing While I’m sinking deeper than deep In darkness, In place I can’t breathe Why did I choose to burden ones I love When I can help them By vanishing right here right now -Aria Chez