Edible Bugs gift pack - 6 delicious packs for just $39.99
What man doesn't want to go all Bear Grylls from time to time. Now you can truly call yourself an enabler with a week's worth of work lunches, plus a spare tin for when he's extra hungry and craving some Queen Waver Ants or Dung Beetles.
The Panda Coat
The Panda Coat - a steal at just $200
So your man's not really an outdoorsy, bug eating, adventure type? He's a little more soft and sensitive? No problem - nothing screams soft and sensitive louder than a Panda Coat. While many males whine about gifts of clothing, I am certain this would go down a treat. You can enjoy hours watching your man frolic in the bushes outside, leaping high into the air in a totally Panda-like state of euphoria.
Arse / Face Soap
Arse / Face Soap - $9.90
Seriously. Why hasn't anyone thought of this sooner? This is right up there with Post It Notes and cask wine as far as genius inventions go. No more dodgy short and curlies to pick off the soap before applying it to your delicate facial area. It's the most practical of all gifts.
The Dog House. Like, literally
Dog House Human Tent - $49.95 and worth every cent
Is your man prone to giving you the shits? Then send him to the dog house. Literally. Keep that bad boy erected in your yard as a visual warning should he consider stepping out of line. Also excellent alternative accommodations for heavy snorers. Him, not you. Obviously.
Manly Room Spray
Manly Room Spray - Set of 3 for $14
Look, anything is better than fart, burp and sweat, right? Now you can compromise and instead sniff the sweet scents of 'Hunting Lodge', 'Distillery' and 'European Sportscar'. You may be sacrificing your Morning Dew, Vanilla Bean, Oriental Sunset and the like, but this is his gift, not yours.
The biggest problem is going to be choosing between all the awesomeness and picking just one gift. Right?