Barack Obama's Diary: Vlad Makes an Offer

Dear Diary: Aauugh!  How much can a human being be expected to endure? I offered a generous compromise to those few millions who claim to have had their healthcare plans cancelled. Then,  when I summoned insurance company CEOs to the White House to instruct them on what I required, they whined that  that they had not been consulted  before I announced what action they must immediately take. What impudence!  They have actuaries who do nothing else but make such calculations. They are not fooling me with their jargon:  I asked them: "If a=b  and b=a what is d? They all looked me blankly. It's hard to believe any of them have even run  a lemonade stand.  Nobody knows the trouble I've seen... As I sat down for lunch with Joe Biden, my iPresidentophone burst into a rousing hip-hop rendition of Keep The Red Flag Flying. " Putin?" I asked, for it was his ringtone.  "Obamavitch! Nasdrovia!"  "Vlad!," I declared. "You sound uncommonly cheerful today..."
"Obamavitch have I go a proposition for you! We have a system that will complement your  American GPS system and all we need for it are a few small listening-- cough... I mean relay stations, on the American mainland  In return for that I am offering you use of our OGRE supercomputer to run your "ObamaCare".
"SoetoroCare, Vlad." I sniffed.
"Whatever, Obamavitch" said Putin. I expressed great interest in OGRE and promised to follow up.
But enough about me.