Today was a hard day. In fact, many days have been hard in the months since I've blogged.
I work in a tough area now. I have to be honest - I have thin skin and I don't know if I'm strong enough to stay where I am.
Imagine for a moment a bungee cord wrapped around my waist. Now imagine that each of the following are other bungee cords pulling on the one around my waist from all different directions.
1. Acacia (speech therapy, school, nutritional concerns, etc.)
2. Kyden (behavior, daycare, etc.)
3. Dawson (developmental milestones, daycare, etc.)
4. My husband
5. My work (extended hours, increased professional development)
6. My house (a mess!)
7. My project facilitators want my classroom completely ECERS compliant.
8. My students' families need accommodations to meet program requirements.
9. My students' individual educational needs must be met (all 20 students).
10. My extended family
11. The dentist says I need another root canal.
12. Taxes need to be done.
13. University - should I go back or should my husband? I only need two more classes to get my Early Childhood Special Ed. endorsement. Maybe I should go back for those. Or maybe Shaun should be able to finally complete his BA (He has an Associate's Degree).
14. LVMOMs
15. My husband will be unemployed in a few months.
16. Finances.
I'm being pulled in so many directions that sometimes it's literally hard to stand up. And it's not that I don't love most of the things on that list. I do. It's just so hard to meet all of the expectations and needs of every one of them. I care very deeply about my family and my work. That's why it breaks my heart when I just can't do it all. And it hurts even more when I feel unappreciated and devalued in some aspects of my life.
I know I'm not the only one who feels this way. So to everyone else with 16+ bungee cords pulling you in various directions, let me tell you that I empathize. We need to help each other stay standing. So that's why I'm making a commitment to come back to my blog and my friends here. I've missed you!
"The good life is one inspired by love and guided by knowledge." -Bertrand Russell
-I aspire to live by this philosophy each and every day. It is an ongoing process.