I know all of y’all are excited for tomorrow’s return of True Blood, so I wanted to make sure I got another column up for you.
Things are never simple when you are a telepathic barmaid. If you think you could do it better, by all means, you haven’t had to sit through an entire afternoon of listening into Jane Bodehouse’s mental compilation of men she’s bedded over the years. You’d think after years of being an alcoholic, she’d forget the names of most of them, but her ability to recall at least the names is sometimes outstanding.
I apologize, that is rude of me to speak of the inner thoughts of others. So let’s just keep that to ourselves and get to today’s post.
Dear Sookie,
Why did you get with Eric? You hated him, it was only when he lost his memory that you liked him, then once he was back, you dumped him again. What was the point?
Why Go There
Why Go There,
I feel like the word ‘hate’ is too strong to describe what I felt for Eric prior to his amnesia.
Honestly, I can see your confusion. After all, I had worked really hard to fight against the attraction I felt towards him. I could easily go on and say that this was all a side effect of having Eric’s blood or even just my way of coping after seeing Bill had moved on. But truthfully, the attraction was always there.
What do I mean by that?
Eric isn’t usually one to hide his intentions. If he wants to bed you, you know. But he’s not exactly forthcoming. He is manipulative, calculating and extremely high handed. He does what he thinks is best and doesn’t bother to even ask before doing so. And trust me, as nice as a package as you get, sometimes his ego can be a bit much to handle.
But those nights with Eric.. I will cherish that time, more than I could ever express to you. Eric wasn’t jaded or hardened from time, he just was. Without those walls that had been built over the past 1,000 years of existing, I was able to see things about Eric that I never would have.
Before you believe that I only want that Eric, let me stop your thoughts right there.
See, I realize that is not the real Eric. It was only a part of him, a part that I needed to experience for myself in order to open myself to him. But that being said, I am not over Bill.
I know he betrayed me, manipulated me and lied to me, but he’s the first man (vampire) I have ever loved and that is not something one easily forgets. In fact, I believe some part of me will always love him. So for the time being, I am better off alone. I have far too much to figure out in my own head and trying to kid myself into thinking I could choose between either of them at the moment, would just leave us all more hurt than we already are.
I know that’s probably not the answer you are seeking and I apologize for that. But I now understand what Eric meant when he said he didn’t like to feel. Feelings are a tricky thing and they are never simple.
Sookie Stackhouse
If you have any questions you would like to Ask Sookie…feel free to drop me an email here!