Every so often, I receive an e-mail that reminds me why I blog. Not that I need a reminder, per se, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t occasionally doubt this little corner of the Internet that I have deemed my own. Sometimes I wonder if I’m sharing too much. Sometimes I wonder if I’m sharing too little. And sometimes, I wonder if I’m sharing anything worthwhile in the first place.
Funny enough, it’s usually in the midst of one of those times, when the perfect e-mail pops up in my inbox, reassuring me that my words have not been written in vain. Like this one;
Hi Ashlee,I don’t know you but after reading your post on ‘the friend I want to be‘ I just have to share my thoughts with you.
I was just wandering around on twitter and ended up on your blog and the title jumped out at me. I guess it was the answer I was looking for and the whole reason I was even searching around to pass the time. I’m going through a very difficult and heartbreaking friendship breakup that is making its way through a whole group of friends. I started questioning all friendships and exactly as you said….are my expectations too high? It’s one thing to hang out and have fun but when times are tough, that’s when you really seem to find out who your real friends are. The solid ones that will stand up for you or be there no matter what.
It brought tears to my eyes reading your description of what kind of friend you want to be. I completely agree! That is what friendship is supposed to be! I know my instincts are right in this situation and even though it’s hard I know it’s for the best.
There is a bride’s toast that I heard once that I remind myself of often. She said that if you want to find the ‘right’ person first you must be the ‘right’ person. She went on to talk about all the qualities she wanted in a man and then thought about whether or not she possessed those qualities. Your post made me think of that and how it really is the same thing with all relationships. I think sometimes when things are bad you need a bit of hope or a reminder that those people really are out there and it’s not just some dream.
Your post gave me that hope and I thank you so much for that. Your friends are very lucky and I’m glad I found this! I really needed it!
I responded to this e-mail privately, and it opened up an entire therapeutic dialogue as we bonded over tales of broken friendships. These are the moments I love about blogging, when two strangers find a common ground and are able to relish in the peace that they’re not alone. That is why I write what I write, and share what I share. And if it makes just one person feel better for just one night, I will consider this blog a wholehearted success.