A Few Things On My Mind Today
1. I got a Clarisonic Mia 2 yesterday, because apparently it is going to revolutionize my skin. I know in my heart however, that it’s quickly going to become taxing to remember to re-charge it. I suspect I’ll use it for one week, and then stuff it under the bathroom sink.
Or so I thought before Caleb saw me take it out of the box last night. “What is that?” he said.
“A Clarisonic,” I said.
“It better not be what I think it is,” he said.
“What do you think it is?” I asked him, puzzled. Then it hit me. He thought it was a vibrator.
I wouldn’t say that I have a problem with vibrators, I just try not to keep any in the house so that I can get stuff done.
“It’s not a vibrator, dummy,” I told him. But secretly, in my heart, I knew it could become one, if I asked it to. I remembered to recharge it before I went to bed.
2. It’s a little weird that no one gave a shit about the Bush twins, am I wrong? Like, it was announced today that Jenna Bush is pregnant, and I’m like who? I wasn’t exactly like that, but I was so disinterested that I didn’t even scroll through the pictures. And I read an entire article about Jessica Chastain this morning, even though she’s the most boring red carpet actress ever to live. I guess it’s because one Bush twin looks like Miss Piggy, and other looks like a witch, and neither one of them does anything interesting except get embarrassingly drunk.
3. Right now I’m flying through Junot Diaz’s This Is How You Lose Her. No matter what you say about Junot Diaz being a cabron sin talent, he writes a very readable story. My question is that apparently, he says the book is semi-autobiographical. But all of the characters are players who are constantly cheating on their girlfriends with super hot chicks. And I’m like, seriously Junot Diaz…
Women hit it with you?
Then again I hear Gary Shteyngart gets a lot of pussy.
4. My biggest dilemma today is whether or not I am going to buy the second season of The Good Wife on iTunes. If you know me, you know I’m clearly going to buy it—at the latest tomorrow. I’m like so into Alicia and Will, thinking about them makes me want to use my Clarisonic. It’s more a question of how long I’ll wait, and how much I have to punish myself in advance so that I can minimize the guilt afterwards.
That’s it for now. It’s dark outside. That means I can drink wine, right?