As we have combined and stopped the hiding that we did for so long it seems that you see each other new more and more in every passing moment. It isn’t that you see them with the content you have with how you see each other, you start to see how they have the most beautiful scares in how they became the way they became. If you never experience the joy of looking into each other and seeing each other how will you know what it is that you are looking at inside of the love that is connected to you both?
We share in everything, I put toothpaste on her brush just as she does mine, I start the shower she makes sure it is the temperature we both need or want. We make the bed together, we pick up the clothes we tore off each other night before together, we are together. I get the coffee, she gets the water!
I could go on, and on, about this and how it is, yet I feel the most important parts happen without these things, we never miss a moment, if you are trapped in your mind when you are with your partner, you will miss what you can share with another, why not say it out loud? Remember you are no longer alone, nor are you judged as though you are. If I am feeling any kind of way, she will grab my hand and ask me what am I thinking about, I don’t say nothing, I say exactly what it is!in this case I will say, How do we change the world of where we are to show them it is the truth? She will usually say why do you always ask a question you already know the answer to? Or something like that!
As the moments have passed, and the knowing has greatly achieved a more vibrational place inside of our union, I can say this without any hesitation. In this moment and at all moments to come, or passed, my heartbeat is and always will be directly connected to her’s inside of the greatest most beautiful experience known… It will not need any belief from what I can say here or do there, yet if you are seeing these words and feeling what they mean as it comes to what your heartbeat can give you, then you are abstractly embracing this connection without any words that can be said.
This past week we uncovered a deep sadness in me that had not been hidden, but was something it was time to share with each other, I was somewhat quiet more than normal, I was inside of myself talking as we all do from time to time, and when she would ask, I would say I am feeling places in me that need healing. She was patient with me all week, for I had started to ask myself what it was that I needed to see, well she held my hand and said you have always been working, you spent a great deal of time, your whole life serving, and working to do what your mother and father had done, do you ever miss that?
Now, how did she see this in me as I couldn’t see it in myself? Well, she was there for most of it, I was a work horse, I wanted to be successful at every turn, How do you just turn something like that off, and not wonder where the energy went? We looked even deeper and saw that what I loved to do was to change lives, the capacity of what I do now seems so much more evolved and deeper, as I have had to be patient and be understanding and even wait for those times the minds settle to accept what is changed within you that now separates you from what you think, and what you truthfully are.
This hole in me was placed in a way that kept me saving, working, providing yet keeping me from what I have now in my existence. How do you just shut this off and go a different direction and not wonder where the energy went? It isn’t like it was just shut off, it was removed in such a way that I didn’t have time to really grieve the change, or the acceptance that I now have no use for the material as I found a wealth that far surpasses it within our union.
As these discoveries continue to find us in our journey, it is so beautiful cause in those moments we celebrate the truth inside of this connection that we all make up different things inside ourselves that keep us from truly accepting things that are the way they are. In some cases we make them negative, missing the positive that it brings into our lives, even the absence of things that are never going to make a difference cause you can’t take them with you!
None of what you will experience in material will ever give you any part of the love that you truly are meant to experience in individual form yet connected to it’s truth you find everything.
As we went through this, this past couple of days it was another place of pain that love had to be embraced because I had a hole created in a image of my own father and mother that stated I needed to be always saving, always working and always be a certain kind of way to be successful. Many, may experience this alone and just change rapidly, or suddenly, yet don’t really see the depth of what this can mean to share this with someone they are connected to. It looks like a change and then you suggest other changes without knowing the impact of those changes, cause you didn’t share them with the other.
Some go deeply into what they were taught and miss this completely. It abandons you as much as you abandon yourself! This domino effect eventually cuts you off from your ability to connect. Now this is important here for those who keep things to themselves. Do you see how this love is deeply embedded to ensure that all the forms of what was never communicated finds a direct path to communicate?
I am deeply in love with the union, which places myself in that place where I now can see myself under a lens that has no hiding, it sees no point. We both see each other in this way. For this past week she went through a significant place as well, the hole that was placed in her as her mother and father consumed the burned place that she felt lost in, now holding hands we are, sense was made of it. This was the truth about where his her father’s love presumed, so did the chances she got to learn about her father in a bar that he would talk to her like one of the guys when she got old enough. This kept her from getting what she had inside of the idea of what a father should be we all create this image like it or not the media helps paint any picture so does the mind when it sees it happen outside of the truth you keep inside yourself. This didn’t happen for her until her 21st year. She talked alot about what her sister felt yet, I could see in her what she felt, what she wanted to go back and fix, how could she now he passed in 1995?
She does so with me, we follow through on what this means to how you learn yourself to heal yourself. Why rein-act it because you can’t truly accept the way it went so you make sure that your love becomes truthful in allowing answers to come when it is needed.
We have gone to where her father drank himself to death, we sat in his chair and experienced it as though it was that time, they talked about everything as did we! Yet there was a time when she experienced something she never told anyone she shared this with me and it explained what I had dreamed about her before. She saw and heard her fathers cries which impacted her for the remainder of her time before now, not being able to hold him and tell him it’s ok, she saw what no child ever wants to see, their parent vulnerable, broken, and no way to shield them from what pain is consuming them. How do you heal this? Why do you not take this and understand this to is a very deep place inside of this union you will heal between you. Trust me it is.. this is what you experience. Much like the sum of all images you experience when you existence here passes before you finally leave, you get to go through with another who can share these images with you to heal through them embracing the pain to place love inside of it, and to forgive through them and to love deeply in a way that was never there before.
I am not sure if any of this answered what you may think this connection is, but it sure is a real glimpse into the truth of this connection and it’s daily moments that are pure as you can imagine. Pure unconditional love with a wealth of answers placed inside of it to be the union that changes everything. How this mirror is inside you is one of a kind.
Thank you all for reading and thank you all for believing!
Clark