Graduating from college sucks because you are thrown into the “real world” which is just a fancy word for hell. In today’s era, your parents think college then working in a cubicle for 40+ hours a week while paying off student loans is normal, responsible, and necessary. Shoot me in the face. Some people can stand it, but I didn’t sign up to sit in front of a computer, progress towards obesity, and obtain diabetes and depression while being controlled by A-holes. I guess it’s time to apply for that stripper job that I always see on Craigslist. At least they don’t drug test.
I knew this before I went to college, but now I really know this. Why else would I design obnoxious T Shirts & blog about jolly fat people that make me laugh? Because it’s the only thing left that keeps me sane. Right now, with a college degree, you can either get a minimum wage paying job at Burger King… or a minimum wage paying job working your butt off at a large corporation. I know, it’s called “getting your foot in the door,” but the work/pay scale is ridiculous and it’s BS. But wait- you can’t even get that ##&! job anyway. We have outsourced every job in America and now we are royally screwed.
If life really sucks and you’re jobless and ugly, there is always option C (living at home).
1) With a college degree, you can either get a minimum wage paying job at Burger King… or a minimum wage paying job working your “A” off at a large corporation. Your only options to make real money are to find a sugar daddy or strip.
2) You’re in a transition from youth to ugly.
3) The club scene now freaks you out and drinking alone is more fun.
4) You’re starting to realize that smoking cigarettes and taking Adderall should probably be discontinued but you don’t want to stop either.
5) The amount of student loan and credit card debt you’re in is ridiculously high and probably not a penny of that debt went towards good use.
7) All you really want is to win the lottery, be on reality television, or find some non-legitimate way to make millions. You would buy a lottery ticket but you’re stoned and don’t feel like getting one.
Reasons why being in your mid 20′s doesn’t suck.
1) You can usually still get laid, even if you don’t have a car, job, or money.
2) Miley Cyrus is now 18 and you’re not out of that +/-10 year age difference for a controversial relationship.
