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Yahoo’s New CEO Melissa Mayer Says Employees Must, Like, Totally Show Up For Work To Get Paid

By Nottheworstnews @NotTheWorstNews

GigaOM reports that new Yahoo CEO, Marissa Mayer has made some changes since becoming CEO of the company. Those include: giving employees free food at work; giving them free smartphones; and (gasp) now banning working from home.

We hope there are not any homeless Yahoo employees, because that would create quite the conundrum, if they legally list their employment headquarters as their “last known address.”

We also wonder if any Yahoo employees are using Yahoo message boards to complain that they have to show up somewhere to eat free food, interact with co-workers, and potentially interact with their friends on iChat on their free smart phones, instead of doing work.

3 Worse Places An Employer Could Force You To Work Than An Office With Free Food

1. A fast-food restaurant with free food where teenagers spit in their own food. Stop spitting in your own food, teenagers!

2. Editing a job-search page for unemployed people, where all you get to write is articles about how much you hate the free pasta with sun-dried tomatoes you get at work.

3. Working from home, not knowing that your wife invited a vampire into the house. Now you’re the “free vampire food,” sucker! (And your wife may be cheating on you!)

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