Humor Magazine

Ten of the Very Best Breakup Songs for Men to Listen Too

By Russell Deasley @Worlds_Top_10

It doesn't take a genius to work out that breakups aren't the best that the world has to offer. With that in mind, we have decided to compile a list we have called: 10 Best Breakup Songs for Men. Now, these song ain't going to get your ex back, nor will they make you find true love. But they should help you cope.

What makes breakups suck even more is they all end up ending defiantly. Depending on who did the dumping will decide what kind of mood you're in, but we have to say, our list is pretty diverse. We have the lot. From tearjerkers, to "I want to rip your face off". Just sit back, press play and do whatever you feel like. Everyone knows that men don't cry. It's just fact! But with that in mind, it's okay to shed a single tear - unless of course, you are Chuck Norris. Which in that case you know it's impossible. Get your tissues at hand and lock your bedroom door (no, not for that) so you can quietly let a few subtle tears out.

10 - Johnny Cash - Hurt (Nine Inch Nails cover)

We are sorry. We had to start with a killer didn't we! If self-pity is what you're after then Johnny Cash is ready to deliver. Remember to switch off all mobile phones and answer the front door to no one - unless the pizza man comes a knocking.

9 - Blink 182- I'm Lost Without You

The pop-punk trio: Tom, Mark and Travis are known for their inappropriate behaviour, party anthems and breakup-related songs. But instead of going with an upbeat song by the band, we decided to go with I'm Lost Without You; as you will find out, the lyrics complement breakups nicely. I Miss You, Not Now & Adam's Song are also great breakup material. Feeling sorry for yourself isn't always the best idea. Sometimes it's best to play some feel-good music and just try and forget anything happened.

8 - Graham Central Station - Pow

You may be thinking to yourself that Pow isn't really a breakup song. And what we have to say to you is: why would you want to be caught with your funk down? You have got to love slap bass lines that make you want to tap your foot and sing along. Unsure whether to trash your room in anger, or cry in a corner? If so then this next song should be right up your alley.

7 - Eminem - Kim

The typically mixed love messages are present in this song: from "I hate you" to "oh my god I love you". Eminem sings this song with such aggression that your blood will begin to boil as you listen. Just be warned: you may feel the urge to tip your bed upside-down. Now to the upbeat tempos that should get you in a better mood. On another note: If your relationship was based on sex then you will find the irony in the following songs. If it was then it would be best not to take any notice of the lyrics.

6 - Papa Roach - I Almost Told You That I Loved You

I Almost Told You That I Loved You by Papa Roach is all about basing a relationship on sex and that getting love involved just messes things up. This can be seen with the following lyrics: "I say the damnedest things when you're on top of me".

5 - Limp Bizkit - Nookie

This is the same as the last song regarding a relationship based around sex. But saying that, we are too busy nodding our heads to the groovy bassline Limp Bizkit has going on to care. Are you ready for the blood boiling, anger ranging, songs? Turn up your speakers as the next few are best at loud volumes. I hope you haven't made your bed yet as it's probably going to get tipped up...again In fact, if you live close to a farm, go and tip over a cow (then help him back up of course).

4 - Eamon - Fuck it (I Don't Want You Back)

A song all about a breakup that says the word "fuck" 20 times...what could be more fitting? We just feel that the pizza didn't deserve to get thrown on the floor.

3 - Bloodhound Gang - I Hope You Die

Adele! With her famous words "I wish nothing but the best for you..." Not a chance! What you really want to do is wish someone pain. For that reason Bloodhound Gang's - I Hope You Die is fitting. Obviously the lyrics shouldn't be taken literary. The next lot are for you hardcore kinds who wish to be "brootal". To the rest of you, you will probably be thinking "what is this pile of s**t". If you don't listen to anything heavy or you think NickelBack are classes as Metal, then give the next two a listen and you may be quite surprised.

2 - A Day To Remember - Heartless

This is the best song to send your friend who has broken up with a girl who you detested. Listen to the lyrics and you will understand why. If sending it fails to cheer him up, don't forget you could always buy him a beer.

1 - Emmure - I Thought You Met Telly And Turned Me Into Casper

Frankie Palmeri (the singer of Emmure) goes as brutal as it gets! The chances are, if you have been listening to this, you either have no bedroom left, or you have been windmilling for the last half an hour. That's it for the 10 Best Breakup Songs for Men post. We hope you enjoyed our song choices and let us know below if any needed adding.


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