Debate Magazine

Meet the Polyamorous Brit Who Lives with Two Women in the US, Raising Their Children as ‘a Throuple’

By Eowyn @DrEowyn
Jane, Adam and Brooke

Jane, Adam and Brooke

Daily Mirror: This is the man once voted ‘least likely to have a girlfriend’ who now lives with two, raising their children as a threesome. Briti Adam Lyons, 34, is in a polyamorous relationship – having more than one partner at once – with Brooke Shedd, 26, and Jane Shalakhova, 25.

Adam and Brooke have just given birth to a baby boy, Dant – and the ‘throuple’ hope to raise their child together in Los Angeles.

The trio – who share a super-kingsize bed and take it in turns to have romantic date nights together – insist that they can provide a loving family environment for their newborn.

“I started reading about pick-up artists and how you can use psychology to make yourself more attractive. I would practice by standing in Leicester Square at lunchtime and after work, trying to get girls’ phone numbers as they walked past. In no time, I was sleeping with amazing women I could only have dreamed of back at school.” Adam became so knowledge at seducing girls that he started a career as a dating coach – running the popular YouTube channel AFCAdamLondon.

But Adam grew tired of dating multiple women – he says as many as 14 at a time – and yearned for the commitment of a stable relationship. In 2007, Adam met Alexandra (not her real name), who was five years his junior. After dating for a year, they got married and started their new life together in Texas where she was from.

It didn’t work out so in a bid to save their marriage, Adam and Alexandra decided to give polyamory a go. He explains: “Alexandra and I figured that if we had a polyamorous marriage, then perhaps we would have a better chance of staying together.”

“Alexandra started sleeping with a few different guys and I started dating a woman I met in a bar. It was great. I even met and became mates with some of the men Alexandra was dating. It was really good bonding for us – chatting about our sexual exploits was a turn on and we’d go make love to each other afterwards. It helped our relationship.”

But things got complicated between the pair when Alexandra suggested that Adam sleep with one of their mutual friends, Brooke.

Brooke, who worked as a bartender at the time, says: “I had always liked Adam. We had a lot in common and from the moment we met, there was an instant chemistry between us. Over time, our friendship grew into something deeper.”

Adam ended relations with the other women and realised he wanted to end his marriage to Alexandra. Although Adam and Brooke were thrilled to be together finally, neither of them wanted to have a completely monogamous relationship.

Adam says: “It was amazing to be living with Brooke now and I loved hanging out with her and her son, Oliver. But after trying marriage out with Alexandra, I didn’t want to limit myself to being with just one person ever again. I loved the polyamorous lifestyle because it’s okay to date someone else if one partner can’t provide exactly what you need at that time.

A spare in case one can't give you what you need at the time...

A spare in case one can’t give you what you need at the time…

Brooke, from Texas,says: “Equally although I loved Adam, I didn’t want to stop seeing other women. I really pushed for us to have an open relationship too. So Adam and I decided to work as a team and pick up girls to have sex with together.”

Adam and Brooke continued having casual threesomes together but were also looking for a third woman to permanently join their relationship. Then in April 2013, the twosome met photographer, Jane, in a nightclub in Texas and immediately hit it off with her.

Adam says: “I knew Jane was unique from the moment we met her. The three of us clicked as soon as we started chatting. We left the nightclub to go grab some dinner with Jane and then Brooke and I took her back to our house for a few drinks.”

Jane – who is bisexual but who had only been in a monogamous relationship before – says: “I loved how there was no pressure to do anything when I first met Adam and Brooke. We just hung out, spoke and flirted at their house. I had never experimented with polyamorous relationships but with Adam and Brooke, it felt so natural. They were two awesome people. It’s like imagine you meet your soul mate. Now multiply that by two. It’s twice the love.

Jane and Brooke like to get it on and provided a picture to prove that to you.

Jane and Brooke like to get it on and provided a picture to prove that to you.

In early 2014, Brooke, Adam and her son moved to Los Angeles to be nearer to Jane. A few months later, they all bought a house that they could all live in together. After a year of living as a trio, Adam and Brooke just gave birth to a baby boy, Dante in February and they hope to raise him together with Jane. Adam and Brooke strongly believe that three parents are better than two.

throuple

Brooke explains: “What’s the difference between explaining to your kid that they have a mom and a dad or that they have three parents that love him? I’m so protective of my children. I feel so lucky that Oliver and Dante will have two other parents who immediately care for him.”

There may even be more babies joining the family. Jane says: “I will have kids in a few years too. Caring for Dante has been good practice. And I know Brooke will be there for me when I’m pregnant.”

The threesome insists that their relationship is like any other normal couple’s. But they say that time management is crucial to the success of their relationship. Brooke explains: “We have to make sure everyone gets time together so every pair has a set date night.”

They are also open to the possibility of adding a permanent, fourth partner to their throuple. Brooke says: “We are committed to each other. But we would be open to adding another person if we met another girl who we liked and fitted into our lifestyle. It’s not something we’re concerned about at the moment, you can’t instantly introduce someone to your life. In the same way that it’s hard to find one person to commit your life to – there’s three of us who have to agree to the next person.”

See also:

DCG


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