Dear Santa,
Over the years we’ve been caught kissing, having cookies and milk together and even playing reindeer games when we got into the liquor cabinet with Blitzen that one time. But the gifts I’ve gotten over the years have been mediocre at best. I don’t mean to be critical, but I do most of the work around here only to get rewarded with a new blender or cutlery set. You also must be losing some memory too. I think I got the same Christmas sweater three years in a row. Might want to think about a replacement soon as I think you might need to check into that swanky Santa retirement village in Boca Raton.
But now that the kids are grown and gone, we don’t need to pretend anymore. I want and feel I deserve better at Christmas. No more “perfume”, (that went out with my grandma’s generation) and no more make up kits you get for free from the malls because they “overstock” those for doorbusters on Black Friday either. Let’s get real with the gifts. Here’s my list and don’t pull a Grinch on me either. I can be your worst Cindy Lu Whoville nightmare if pressed. Just sayin.
- Dark Spot Remover/Corrector that actually works. We would all love to look younger, but at least not look like someone took a brown marker to my face while I slept and played dot-to-dot.
- A Tiny Home for when I need a space to be alone but not too far away from home. Or to host a girl’s night where the kitchen is just full of booze and snacks and no one sneaking in to “sample” the snacks.
- A Cleaning Service. Just because and we don’t need a reason.
- Readers. Fancy and Stylish. We need lots of them to go in every room and vehicle.
- Concert Tickets to all GenX concerts. In the area. Unless you pay for travel and accommodations too!
- A Home Organizer to reorganize and purge all the crap. While I sit on the couch drinking Prosecco and watch it all happen.
- Coffee Mugs with sayings on them that are witty and sarcastic. Oh, and a portable coffee warmer too so we don’t have to keep getting up and going to the microwave.
- DNA Ancestry kit. Nothing like finding out you have a half sibling out there after 40 years!
- Nothing with “Empty Nester” on it.
- A weekend get-away somewhere warm and beautiful with a pool and swim up bar where they play music with steel drums all day. Oh, and bottomless margaritas.
That’s it! Next year I might be asking for grandbabies.
Meme of the week: (Via DigitalMom)
