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3 Worse Fictional Characters A New Zealand Reporter Could Have To Interview Than Cookie Monster

By Nottheworstnews @NotTheWorstNews

The New Zealand Herald news “reports” that Sesame Street characters Cookie Monster and Elmo “were game for a bungy jump if they ever came to New Zealand together.”

“Will they or won’t they?” wonders probably nobody except the puppet masters who may now be wondering if they’ve obligated themselves to plummeting head first over a cliff with puppets in their hands.

We at NotTheWorstNews read a lot of news, so know how hard it could be to write a full story with material like this actual quote from today’s New Zealand Herald site to work with:

“”Me not only eat cookies. Me like vegetables, fruits, carrots are yummy. Me like the crunch.”

Still, it could be worse, so here are three worse fictional characters a reporter could have to interview.

1. Silent Bob. Although interviewing a silent person may provide challenges, Kevin Smith’s Silent Bob character may still be easier to interview than a mime who spends the entire interview trapped in an inaccessible imaginary box.

2. One Ring from Lord of The RingsSure the ring, like the movies, may have been made in New Zealand, meaning any New Zealand reporter ought to have great potential access to the ring. That said, interviewing a ring that corrupts anyone involved with it, and everyone wants to destroy, is probably not a good idea. Especially if it leads to another nine hours movie trilogy about the reporter who just had to put the ring on, even while everyone in the theater was all loudly whispering “Don’t touch the ring!”

3. The Ring from the Movie The Ring. In case you’ve forgotten, the Ring is a video where anybody who sees the video will get a creepy phone call and then die within a week. The good news is digital media has made the odds of any such contrived, illogical danger obsolete. The bad news is that even if the Ring just says “Bzzzzzz” a lot, it still probably has better grammar than Cookie Monster, the character who teaches kids the importance of vegetables, but not necessarily helping the four-year old demographic master English.

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