remember, the new Sucker Punch film is from Zack Snyder, the director of Dawn of the Dead (never fancied it) and 300 (energising but often just too much like a homo-erotic Davidoff 'cool water' advert, featuring a cringe-worthy husband/wife in bed moment) and Watchmen (too many cod-pieces, not enough meat) and Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga'Hoole (which was actually quite okay if you understand that the goody-goody hippy owls are as fucking tyrannical and mentally retarded and psychologically sinister as the naughty-naughty military owls) which I sorta snear-reviewed in this recent blogpost.Sucker Punch was a grimly-one-handed 12-certificate MK-Ultra snuff-film boasting gratuitous crotch shots of pony-tailed non-natural-blondes and enormously over-powering and needlessly testosterone-fuelled father figures.
But all that tat aside, the biggest crime of this 'Cruel & Unusual Production' was that it played like every bland episode of 90210, it's just that the adverts were for manga porn sex toys and how to use them to MURDER, KILL & SLAUGHTER.
It's a 12-certificate, ffs!
The script was as hobbling as the tottering high heals this ridiculous film asks the girls escape in.
Sucker Punch could be the equivalent of Paul Verhoeven's Showgirls, and he could look back on this particular outing as one of his worst film to date.
Oh, and don't think of moving into pop video direction, Snyder - you don't got it.
The moral message of this film seemed to be TAKE ON THE MILITARY, YOU GOT THE GUNS, PEOPLE -- what an amateurishly childish political stance, you'll all be slaughtered or incarcetared on day two of the 'war'.
Oops, did I oversell this bowl of steaming tripe?
Bonues DVD Features should have been: the ability to just watch the fucking manga porn sex toys adverts all the way through in one go. Just edit that gorily addictive eye candy together and leave out the tedium, forget forever the tooth-grinding range of pop songs someone chose over a decent driving soundtrack.
