Humor Magazine

Your (late) Monday Funny: 11.3.13

By Davidduff

Sorry, sorry, I'm late with your funny today but what with the ironing, the hoovering, emptying the dishwasher, dusting and polishing, planning tonight's meal . . . well, who said men can't multi-task?!  If these are not very funny then you can look forward to my latest analysis - don't laugh yet! - of the European situation which is to follow.  In the meantime:

 

These are classified ads which were actually placed in
Newspapers:
FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
8 years old, Hateful little bastard. Bites!
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FREE PUPPIES
1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog.
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FREE PUPPIES. Mother is a kennel Club registered German Shepherd.
Father is a Super Dog, able to leap tall fences in a single bound.
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COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED. Also 1 gay bull for sale.
________________________________________________________
JOINING NUDIST COLONY!
Must sell washer and dryer £100.
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WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE .
Worn once by mistake.
Call Stephanie.
___________________________________________________________
And the WINNER is...

FOR SALE BY OWNER. Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica, 45 volumes.
Excellent condition, £200 or best offer.
No longer needed, got married, wife knows everything.

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Thought from the Greatest Living Scottish Thinker--Billy Connolly.
"If women are so bloody perfect at multitasking,
How come they can't have a headache and sex at the same time?"
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