I once heard that life was about the 3 C’s, Choices, Chance, & Change. You have to make a choice to take a chance to make a change or something like that. In reflecting on this I find it to be true. Many times we get stuck in a situation or in some position and we get comfortable. We start to fear anything that’s different or out of the ordinary then what we’re use to. Some people embrace change while others run from it and slam the front door dead in its face. Some are afraid of taking a chance because they’re simply not risk takers and fear that the gamble they take will not work in their favor. Lately, I’ve seen more and more people run from something new and embrace what is comfortable to them. By comfortable I mean a certain type of person you’re use to dating, your particular pattern, and people who fit into what you feel is comfortable.
Think about it, how many times have we stayed in a relationship longer than we should have? How many times have we ran away from something that was good for us but fear held us back because the person was different then what we were use to, and lastly, how many times have we went back to someone because they were familiar to us, wouldn’t challenge us, and it was comfortable for us? I’ve done all 3 and as a result I could’ve possibly missed out on the “one”. Fear is the most powerful emotion there is but it will only consume you if you let it. For many years I dated within my comfort level and dated people who I was familiar with only to wake up one day and say “this shit ain’t working”. I got my ass out and started dating other cultures and people who were outside the norm for me. It was at that time I realized that we sometimes limit ourselves to the possibility of love by sticking with what’s comfortable. As I said before in one of my blogs when the path you’re on keeps leading nowhere, then maybe it’s time to change paths. Why limit yourself to the possibilities and then walk around singing one of BB Kings greatest hits crying your should’ve, could’ve, would’ve’s. When the opportunity presents itself you might want to kick fear in the ass and run to it. I’ve seen people run from love and then years later run into the person who’s now happily married or in love and then walk away singing the blues “Damn, that should’ve been me”
I do believe that people are placed in our lives for a reason but I also believe that sometimes we kick good people out our lives because of our own insecurities. In some cases, we remove ourselves from people’s lives because of their insecurities and their inability to step outside the box they’ve made for themselves. You can get along well, talk to each other, have a great time but it doesn’t mean you’re in love, its means you’re comfortable. As the old saying goes you are what you attract; so if you’re comfortable and stuck in a box chances are you will attract the same. So now you have two people with something in common but possibly no sparks, no passion, no romance, just a whole lot of comfort! It reminds me of an old movie with Barbara Streisand, The Mirror Has Two Faces. Two people married strictly because they were comfortable with each other. There was no sparks, no passion, no sex (really???), no nothing other than they had similar taste in literature. Well one day she woke up and said enough is enough; she made changes in her life and transformed herself from a plain Jane to a fabulous hot momma. She left “Mr. Comfortable” behind and decided to take chances and live her life. In the end, Mr. Comfortable realized what he had lost and of course he got her back (hey, it’s the movies) but in reality how often does this happen? Don’t get left behind, step outside that decrepit worn out box and take chances. Plus, boxes are not in style at the moment “not cute” at all!
Yes, taking chances and making changes can be scary but hell who has time to live we’re too busy being comfortable, right?
