I love books. Books are awesome. I love how certain books such as Harry Potter, The Hunger Games, and The Outlander Series give me the thrill of adventure and excitement without having to put down my glass of wine. I have a tendency to suffer from post-book depression, which is common in avid readers. Post-book depression occurs when I finish a fantastic book or series with the knowledge that there are no new adventures to be had with my fictional friends. Good books leave a lasting impression.
I also love books because they can be kept in a bookroom. I have a bookroom in my classroom, and this bookroom shelves many exciting adventures between the pages…and out. Lately, I have gotten into a naughty habit of creating my own adventures in this bookroom with another teacher at school. Let’s call him Viper. I am currently typing this while waiting for Viper to come “borrow a book.” I love my job.
(By the way, this post is not actually about books, so if that’s what you are looking for you will not find it here. Keep looking.)
Middle School Crush
The Viper adventure began a couple of months before The Breakup. I tend to give off anti-technology vibes, so I have frequent need of the computer tech at our school. Naturally a friendship developed, but because I was in my loyal-girlfriend-state-of-mind I didn’t really pick up on his not-so-subtle flirty comments.
It got to the point when every time I would call him with a computer problem, he would tell me, “I can fix it, but it’ll cost you.” When I would ask him his price, he would ask for a cup of coffee. You should know that I make fabulous coffee. I have a knack for eyeballing the perfect coffee grounds to water ratio. Add a dash of cinnamon and BAM! The perfect cup of black coffee.
In January we became Facebook friends, and he started messaging me on the weekends. Our messages started out friendly, but they soon became flirtier and flirtier. When he would stop by my room for coffee, he would hang out for a few minutes while waiting for it to “finish” brewing, even when it was done. Every time he stopped by a curious thing happened: I was suddenly very horny.
Good Vibrations
Feeling the tingle below the belt is quite unexpected in a room full of stinky middle school students, but Viper just had a way of instantly turning me on. I started to fantasize about him on my drives to and from work. After G rated conversations with him after school, I would still be turned on when I got home an hour later. Then, he started to send me Facebook messages at six in the morning. That was when I finally figured out that he was interested.
I think Viper was the wake-up call I needed to break up with The Ex. I mean, The Ex and I had a horrible sex life. We had sex about once a month, and even that was a chore. I think it was partially because I didn’t have any respect for The Ex as a man considering his alcoholism, his lack of direction, his dead end pizza delivery job, and his frequent degrading comments towards me; but I am now sure that it was also because The Ex didn’t have a clue about foreplay. He would spring a boner and be ready to pounce without trying to start my engine first. Viper, on the other hand, is a foreplay GOD!
But I’m jumping ahead of myself, and I would like to clarify that I didn’t start fooling around with Viper until about a month after The Breakup.
The Epiphany
Viper helped me to realize a few different things:
a) There are other eligible men in this city, not just The Ex.
b) Many of these other men have much more going for them than The Ex did.
c) Some of these other men actually want me.
d) I could break up with The Ex and thrive instead of simply survive.
Not that I am looking for a new relationship with Viper or anybody else for that matter, nor do I need to have a man in my life to feel like I am worth something, but Viper helped me to realize that I am a strong independent woman who doesn’t need to waste any more time with a loser. I should take advantage of my youth and have fun instead.
And that’s what I’m doing.
In the bookroom.
But more about that later…
