This year I decided to challenge myself to reflect on various Yoga and Buddhist aspects throughout the year. The challenges come from a variety of places including readings in Deborah Adele's Yamas and Niyamas and Thich Nhat Hanh's Heart of the Buddha's Teaching and Happiness.
This week was a great challenge. Am I stepping into people lives and managing theirs instead of mine? When am I running interference rather than letting people face their own situations?
I've been aware of this idea (and actively working on it) for a couple of years, but this week I made a point of being even more aware.
Early in the week I was in a meeting and someone was told, very last minute, that they would be running the meeting for the first time. I really wanted to step in and help them run it because I felt awkwardness that perhaps they weren't doing it "correctly". I curbed that urge and they did a fantastic job (and a very different job than I would have done). It felt great to let them be fully empowered and to recognize there is more than one right answer (something I preach all the time in asana and meditation classes).
One of the biggest places this applies for me is at home. I have such a tendency with my mom to "need to be right". Usually I notice after the fact and regret whatever I said. This week I worked on seeing the situation in the moment and letting her find her own way. And it felt great to create less tension within the house.
Of course, there were times I stepped into others lives and didn't realize until after. How did it feel? Not so good. I didn't feel "right", I didn't even feel that I helped. I just felt as if I took away some of their autonomy.
Moving forward, I will continue to focus on living my own life, making my own decisions and letting others do the same.
