Humor Magazine

The Saturday Six: Symmetrical

By Christopher De Voss @chrisdevoss
 saturday six

 We all have that one friend…that one person…who needs everything just so, just right, everything in it’s place, everything lined up, everything where it should be…

And if you can’t think of that one friend or relative who is like that….guess what?

It’s you!

You can call it a disorder.

You can call it a lifestyle.

Or you can call it an obsession.

Whatever you call it, sometimes it’s nice knowing the universe has order, even if it’s only your tiny corner of the universe, with only your tiny universal stuff.
This week’s SS6 pictures all have their tiny universe in order.

These pictures are also kind of magical.

You can’t look at them without feeling happy.

Put that in your Arby’s hat Pharrell.

Anyway…

Happy Saturday!


1. Cubed Squared

fits1

 BrainRants: Rum and coke! Somebody’s getting naked later, and it’s not you.

Omawarisan – Is the laptop plugged in to the glass? Symmetrical ice cubes produce cold fusion.

Ned: Given the graph paper and these ice cubes, I’d say SOMEONE has an unhealthy obsession with squares. Let me guess what was for breakfast… WAFFLES maybe?!?

List of X: Is that what they call “checking in on Foursquare”?

2. There Is No Wrong Way To Enjoy The Beauty Of A Reese’s

fits2

 BrainRants: It’s a peanut butter cup… I’m waiting to be impressed.

Omawarisan: “I’ve looked at love from both sides now…”

Ned: I eat them so fast I never knew they came in a wrapper. Anyone know how long it takes for paper to digest?

List of X: If you’re careful enough, you can reuse the Reese’s wrapper up to 10 times.

3. You Can’t Eat This Now. It Will Be Uneven

fits3

 BrainRants: This is a picture of some lucky OCD person’s wet dream… just… fix that turkey and lettuce hanging out the side, for the love of God.

Omawarisan: “I’m just having turkey for lunch, I don’t know why I’m gaining weight.” Have you considered the amount of turkey you’re eating, dough boy?

Ned: The vacuum that will be created when these come out will probably cause the Earth to collapse in on itself.

List of X: The best invention since sliced bread – the Tupperware sliced bread.

4. Rubik Packed These

 

fits4

 BrainRants: And this is a photo of some Type 5A asshole’s mind… YOU MISSED A SPECK OF LINT IN THE CORNER!

 Omawarisan: You could be moved out and set up at your new location in the time it took you to do that. Seek help, Mr. OCD.

List of X: Oma and Rants, you’ll be moving to different cubicles in the LAP office. Your stuff has already been packed to the shape and size of your new cubicles.

Ned: I’d like to find out where this person lives and use their restroom just so I could unravel all their toilet paper, then re-wrap it by hand so it’s really crooked.

5. It Looks So Cushion-y

fits5

 BrainRants: Winter, you suck.  You too, Canada.

Omawarisan: I hate the white death. Yes even the new, fresh, undisturbed, symmetrical stuff.

Ned: It’s just waiting for a really nice butt print.

List of X: And it has to be a perfectly symmetrical butt print.

6. Janitor’s Porn

fits6

 BrainRants: Someone at Home Depot’s getting fired.

Omawarisan: Chris, where did you find these? I haven’t been able to get in my house in a month.

Ned: And any one of these can be used to open an old Volkswagen.

List of X: This is what happens when you copy your house key over and over and over again.

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