Yesterday, I posted about editing my WIP (WIP Editing: The Beginning) and how my first big challenge would be reworking the beginning once I was finished with my read-thru, which I am 65% of the way there.
As promised, here are the beginning first few paragraphs. It's only a 265 word snippet but it does a better job of explaining the effect I was going for. This portion, in its unedited form, was written back in January of 2010. With the exception of Chelsei's character description, nothing else has been done to it.
It’s black – like night – but it doesn’t feel like black night, moonless night, starless night. This night is empty of every aspect, devoid of temperature, you’re neither overheated nor exposed raw. You’ve been walking for an immeasurable amount of time, perhaps days but everything has been night.
It’s lonely, and you wish to go home but you’re truly and inevitably lost and there hasn’t been a soul or establishment since you got there. However you ended up there, you don’t know. It’s been so long, you probably wouldn’t know what one looks like if you happened by it.
So you keep moving and if, and when, fate decides to take a part of the night you see a flickering light in the darkness. It’s a square shaped light that spills out from its perch and on to the inky blackness of the night. It looks warm and inviting and it seems to be beckoning you forward.
A shadow passes over it and you’re suddenly not alone in the eerie blackness. They’ve been awaiting your arrival. They know you’ll eventually open the door.
Although, tonight you may have wished you had stayed out in the dark . . .
“How many times do I have to tell you all?” a woman scolded. Her midnight black hair was pulled back into numerously woven box braids, ends tagged with gold and silver beads, which clattered as she whipped her head side to side, giving voice to her growing agitation. “Wipe your feet off before you enter the bar! Why do you think I laid out a welcome mat?”
And thus, the adventure begins. My goal for the end of August: rewrite this beginning so it is virtually unrecognizable and less prosy.
When writing a story, which is the hardest for you to write: the beginning or the end?
(If you have any questions or constructive critiques, feel free to leave a comment down below. You can also follow me on Twitter @TheWritersExpt.)